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We stayed like that for a while, looking at each other across the wide space of the living room. Finally, he gathered his courage and walked up to me. In his eyes, I could see how much he hoped I wouldn’t turn him down.
“Come here,” he said, and dragged me into his arms. I allowed it. “No matter what it is, we’re here for you.”
I closed my eyes as I nestled into the crook of his neck. I inhaled his scent – flowery, manly, and edgy at the same time. I wrapped my arms around his torso, and my fingers rested atop the bone stumps along his shoulder blades, where his archangel wings had once been. Even after all this time, it was still hard to grasp that my Sariel wasn’t an archangel anymore, that he couldn’t fly, that he’d been cast out of Heaven, all courtesy of my father. Valentine Morningstar. He’d caused too much pain, too much hate. He had to go down, and soon.
I pulled myself free. Sariel cupped my face with his hands and leaned in for a frugal kiss. I allowed that, too.
“You have to promise me you won’t come to my room uninvited.”
He nodded.
“Say it.”
“I promise.”
“Also, I know you four have been stalking me. Stop that. I don’t need bodyguards.”
“Mila…”
“Let me do this my way.”
He furrowed his brows and stepped away from me.
“We don’t even know what you’re doing, let alone what your way is! Why don’t you just grow up and stop being so tortured and mysterious?! We. Can. Help.”
“Is that what you think? That I’m being tortured and mysterious?”
“Come on, Mila.”
“No, say it. Say what you really think about me.”
Oh, I knew it wouldn’t be pretty, but I wanted to know. I needed to know what my ex-boyfriends were really thinking about me.
“Mila, we love you so much. We’d die for you, okay? You have to believe that.”
“But? There’s a ‘but’, I’m sure.”
“But since you become a revenant, you’ve been out of control. And we get it. I get it! You need time to figure out how to adapt to this new you. God knows I needed time to accept I’m not an archangel anymore. That I don’t have wings, I can’t fly, and I’m not welcome in Heaven – my own home. But I let you help me. I let you get close to me. And you made it all better. I didn’t only get a girlfriend who’s forgiven my horrible sins, but also three friends who support me and don’t care that I’m a Fallen One. Things turned around for me because of you, Mila. And them. Why don’t you just let us help you like you helped us? Whatever you’re doing, you don’t have to do it alone.”
“I’m not doing it alone,” I whispered.
“Lorna and Corri are helping you. Okay. That’s good. You have a powerful mage by your side, and that helps me sleep at night. But why are you cutting us out? We’ve been through so much together. No matter what it is…”
“Because this one is on me and no one else,” I said. “I love you too much to burden you with…”
“With what?”
I sighed and shook my head dismissively. “Just go, Sariel. I’m tired.”
“Mila…”
“Please. I’ll tell you when I’m ready.”
He ran his hand through his short blond hair. “I’ll take that as a promise.” When I didn’t say anything, he rolled his eyes annoyed and teleported away.
I waited a few minutes to gather my thoughts, then I pulled Corri’s bell from my school bag and rang it three times. The pixie zapped back from wherever she’d been hiding. Probably the kitchen.
“Yoli needs some motivation.”
