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He shrugged. “Maybe.”
“When?”
He laughed at me. Again. “I don’t know.”
“Now?”
“No.”
I paused for a few beats and then said, “How about now?”
“You’re cute when you’re drunk, you know that?” he said.
“So is that a yes?”
“It’s still a no.” He climbed to his feet and held his hand out to me. “Come on, let’s get you to the bathroom before you pass out and embarrass yourself.”
It took me three tries to land my hand in his. “What do you mean?” I staggered to my feet and swayed.
“Never mind. Let’s go.” He wrapped his arm around my waist and led me to the bathroom.
“You never answered my question,” I said.
“I answered your question a hundred times. With the amount of liquor in your system, the only thing I want from your dick is for it to not piss on my couch during the night.”
“Not that question.”
“Oh,” he sounded surprised. “What question?”
It took me a moment to remember. “What’s with all the plants on your windowsill?”
“I like hydrangeas,” he said.
We’d reached the bathroom. He pushed the door open and waited for me to step inside.
“They’re nice,” I said. I tried to lean on the doorway and look suave, but I misjudged my proximity to it and slipped, hitting the sink.
“Are you okay?” Chase leaned in and helped me right myself.
“No.” I shook my head vehemently. It made the room spin. “I think I hurt my dick again.” I reached for his hand. “You better check.”
“You’re ridiculous,” he said, stepping away.
“I’m horny,” I corrected him.
“And you’re gonna stay that way.” He pointed at the toilet. “Go do your business. It’s late, I’m tired, and you’re drunk.”
I wove my way to the toilet, took several tries to unzip my pants, and finally fished my cock out. The room started spinning so I reached out with my free hand to grab the wall. It was farther away than I realized.
“Shit!” Chase said. Before I could turn to look at him, he was standing right next to me and reaching for my dick.
“See?” I said with a smirk. “I knew you wanted it.”
“What I want is for you to piss in the toilet and not my wall or my floor.” He aimed my dick into the bowl. “I hope to God you remember this tomorrow, because it’s gonna be hella more fun to tease you that way.”
I turned my head and looked down at his face. He was right there. Close enough to kiss.
“I want to kiss you,” I slurred.
“You’re oddly charming,” he said. Then he tilted his chin toward my dick and said, “Piss.”
“No, seriously.” The word seemed to come out better that time. “I don’t usually go for kissing all that much, but you have pretty lips.”
“Lucky me. Piss.”
“Your eyes are pretty too. Did you know that? They’re all big and blue, and you have lashes like a girl.”
“I take it back. You’re an ass and I’m odd for finding you charming.” He squeezed my dick. “Drain the lizard, Adan. Let’s go.”
I closed my eyes to concentrate and then heard the stream splashing into the bowl. “I did it,” I said as I opened my eyes.
He shook his head. “Good for you. Keep going.”
“’Kay.” When I was done, he shook me off, tucked me into my pants, and zipped me up. “You going to kiss me now?” I asked while he was washing his hands.
“You smell like a brewery,” he said.
“I can brush my teeth,” I offered.
He wiped his hands on his pants and walked out of the bathroom. “Toothbrush and toothpaste are on the counter. Brush your teeth. I’m gonna make up the couch for you.”
“Then will you kiss me?” I called out after him as I squeezed way too much paste onto his toothbrush.
“I wish I had a video camera,” he muttered. “I’d have blackmail material on you for the rest of your life.”
“I can get a video camera,” I shouted excitedly, drooling foamy paste over my chin. “Then we can make a sex tape like Pam Anderson and Tommy Lee.”
“Are you hung like Tommy Lee?” Chase asked as he walked back to the couch with sheets in his arms.
I spit into the sink and frowned. I was eight inches hard. Did that mean I’d blown my chance with him? I’d never been ashamed of my size, because no matter what bullshit guys spew, eight inches is a good-sized dick. Besides, it wasn’t exactly something I could hide.
“No,” I reluctantly admitted.
“Good,” Chase said. “’Cause that shit would be painful.”
Relieved, I rinsed my mouth, splashed some water on my face, and went back to the couch. Chase was fluffing a pillow. I reached for him. Well, I tried to reach for him. Mostly I fell on him. He grabbed my hips and lowered me onto the couch.
“So we’re seriously not going to fuck?” I asked him.
