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A week and a half…could she show Bass that long term beyond that might not be so bad?
She’d sure as hell try.
Because the idea of someone else didn’t feel right. It felt depressing.
This was going to be the biggest challenge yet.
“You could stay,” she said.
He stopped by her door. “No, I can’t.”
“Why?”
He laughed and glanced down. “You don’t want to know.”
“I wouldn’t ask if I didn’t.”
His dark eyes met hers. “Because if I stay, I’ll fuck you. And I’m not prepared for that. It wasn’t why I came over. Actually, I wasn’t even going to stop by tonight.”
“But you did.”
“Yeah, and now I’m going.”
“What do you mean prepared? What, you have to do pushups beforehand? Guzzle down a protein shake or something?”
He glared at her, and she put her hands on her hips and raised her eyebrows, waiting for a response. Yeah, she was pretty certain she was the only person in his life that pushed him. Pushed for the truth. Pushed for his affection. Pushed for his trust.
“I don’t have condoms on me. That’s what I mean by prepared.”
Oh. What went through her mind made it to her mouth and out loud before she could call it back.
“I was only with one man, one time before you, and we used a condom. I still got checked, just for precaution, so… I’m healthy, if that’s your concern.”
She glanced at her feet, because his dark stare was too heavy to take. Since she’d put that out there, she may as well go the rest of the way.
“I’m on birth control, too.” When he just stood there, she went on, shrugging and hating how pathetic she felt. “I was hoping that someday, when I was with a man I trusted, I’d be prepared. I just didn’t know when that someday was.”
She’d never admitted that because it sounded lame. Like she was waiting around for prince charming to come sweep her off her feet and carry her to her castle with a white picket fence.
But she’d hoped that one day Mr. Right would show up. And there, standing before Sebastian, it hit her. Deep down, she’d always hoped it would be him.
Now I really sound like an idiot.
“Well…” He cleared his throat. “I’ve never been with a woman without a condom.”
Her eyes shot to his. “Never?”
He shook his head. “Never. And before you ask, I’m clean, too.”
A small smile tugged at her lips. There was something special they could share that was just them. She could feel him, with no barriers, and she could be a first for him in some way. It was a huge frickin’ deal to her. So much that she wanted to jump up and down, cheering. This was a step in taking their trust to a deeper level.
“Goodnight,” he said.
“Wait, what?” She all but leapt toward the door to stop him. “You’re still leaving?”
“Yes.”
“Why?”
