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"No one had thought to try it that way, human relationships being such silly, messy things. Still, Melinthros had been sufficiently desensitized and was able to make you. "
"So I'm-I'm half faerie?" My stomach churned. I was going to be sick. Even the way Reth said it-make me.
"Of course not. It doesn't work like that. You cannot become part of eternity with such a definite starting point. "
"What are you saying, then?"
"By having a mortal mother and a faerie father, you're not half faerie. You're just not quite mortal. Less than mortal, in a sense. Nothing faerie transfers over. "
The cold, empty feeling I'd been running from for so long welled up, threatening to overwhelm me with everything I lacked. I wasn't special. I wasn't paranormal. I wasn't even normal. I was neither. Nothing.
"It's necessary, of course. Human souls, fragile as they are, are incredibly complex, ever-shifting. Impossible to add to or take away from. A real human would never be able to function as a conduit or draw any more energy into herself. You are unique in all the realms in that you can shift energy. As to why you can create gates I've never been clear, although my queen seems to think it revolves around some bizarre human sense of home combined with the extra energy and the souls' pull to leave this world. "
He stopped, as though expecting me to say something. What could I possibly say? What could I say to anyone, ever again?
"Of course, there was the matter of Lin losing you, and you have our sincerest apologies for that. As a matter of fact, no one knew you existed at all, save the queen, and she was unaware that Lin had lost you, as she never visits the mortal realm. Imagine her surprise when I described your unique abilities and she realized that you were the Empty One and that Lin was not preparing you for us. Unfortunately I wasn't the only one to recognize you, which led the Unseelie Court to complicate things by sending Vivian after you.
"My queen gave me Melinthros's name and assigned me to determine what, exactly, had happened and how to turn you into what we needed you to be. I had always avoided becoming embroiled in court politics before. Wisely, I might add. It's been exhausting. It was my idea to give you extra soul, but that turned out to be a disaster. " He brushed his fingers against my scar.
I shook my head, too much information clogging my thoughts. "I really don't belong anywhere, do I?"
"Nonsense. " He stroked my wrist. "I said you were a mistake from the beginning, but you're a very endearing mistake, and with the right amount of adjustments you will fit quite nicely in my Realms. And if you serve the queen's purposes, more the better. You weren't made for this Earth, Evelyn. You do not deserve to be fragile, corruptible, dying. You should be eternal. " He leaned in close, a smile equal parts tender and possessive lighting his perfect face. "Eternal with me. "
I had to have a place here, a home. I had to have something. "What about my mom?"
Reth's smile dropped and he turned to the other faerie. "Have you found the girl's mother?"
Lin muttered something unintelligible.
"What did he say?"
"He doesn't know where she is. "
"No," I whispered.
"I am sorry. Loving the fey isn't healthy for mortals. It becomes an addiction, and if the object of their obsession is removed, they waste away. It's discouraged in my court, unless you bring the mortal to the Realms where they can be satiated living among faeries. "
I stood, grief threatening to overwhelm me. I couldn't deal with this. It was too big. Like the draw of the Dark Queen, this feeling would swallow me whole, consume me. I needed to replace it. Jack's words rang in my head-it was always better to be angry than sad.
"You. " I stalked over, standing directly in front of the faerie who had created me. He didn't look up. "Melinthros, you will look at me. "
His head snapped up, blurry eyes glaring at mine.
"Tell me what happened to my mother. "
He spoke as though the words were being forced from him, which they were, thanks to my command. "She took care of the baby until she was no longer necessary. "
"Where is she now?"
"I don't know. "
"Tell me where she is!" I screamed.
"I can't. "
My hands flexed at my sides. He had to tell me. I'd make him tell me.
"Evelyn. " Reth's voice was as soft as his touch on my arm. "I tried myself to find her a year ago. I am sorry. "
