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But it wasn’t just that. Gunter wasn’t going to lie to himself…more than he already had, anyway. He’d been living in the land of denial and justification for some time already. And that had to change.
Gunter wasn’t just alright with Nikki’s company. He actively sought it. He did ridiculous things completely outside of his normal behavior patterns.
He’d booped Nikki’s nose. That said volumes right there. Gunter hadn’t booped a person’s nose in ever. He hadn’t known he could do that, actually. The action had come out of fucking nowhere.
And he’d enjoyed doing it. That flirty little movement had felt good, and Nikki’s response had been delightful. They’d clearly liked it too, if their seeking more contact was anything to go by. They were also always in Gunter’s personal space if they could manage it. And Gunter encouraged them. He’d liked putting hands on Nikki, feeling that slender body warm and close. He liked it a little too much.
Blowing out a breath, he let his head sink for a moment, balancing his weight on the stone balustrade. He should not be acting like this with Nikki. Not without some kind of understanding, or…something. Nikki was a precious mage who deserved a proper mate. They’d stated they wanted a dragon spouse. If Gunter didn’t intend to be that, then he shouldn’t be keeping Nikki close and robbing them of the chance to meet other dragons and properly get to know them.
Just the idea of Nikki flirting with someone else made Gunter’s dragon rear its head and let out a very ugly growl.
Gunter winced. Alright, alright, simmer down. It was a mental image, nothing more.
Gunter’s dragon let out another warning growl. He translated that one as Make sure it doesn’t happen.
The very fact that his dragon was making it loud and clear Nikki was the one they wanted said volumes. Gunter’s dragon had spoken up precisely never about other people. And it wasn’t like Gunter had been celibate for five hundred years. Despite people’s claims, he did leave his library from time to time.
Granted, not often.
Anyway, the point was, Gunter’s dragon was vocal about wanting Nikki. And Gunter knew why. Of course he did, he wasn’t that oblivious. There was a very good possibility Nikki was his mate.
It was an overwhelming thought, no doubt about it. Gunter now had more sympathy for Alric, when he’d first realized Cameron might be his mate. His friend and king had been very torn about what to do. Gunter had thought him ridiculous at the time and had been tempted more than once to kick Alric in the right direction.
Now, finding himself in a very similar position, Gunter had far more sympathy.
Something stopped him from acting. Some fear. It made him hesitate, when few other things in his life had done so. It had taken a while for Gunter to realize what the root of the problem was.
What if Nikki didn’t feel the same way?
Yes, Nikki had kissed him in the library. But Gunter didn’t think of it as more than it actually was—Nikki teasing him. Doing something to deliberately shock him enough to step back. Just the freedom to tease had probably been heady for Nikki, which was why Gunter didn’t put much stock in it.
Right now, Nikki liked being near Gunter because they weren’t properly settled into the castle yet. They were still getting comfortable with everyone. Gunter was a safe harbor. But when that changed, and Nikki acclimatized, would they still choose Gunter’s company over everyone else’s?
Gunter was grouchy. Irritable on some days. He wasn’t the best definition of good company; even to himself he could admit that. Nikki was the type to fit into any social circle and do it with style. Once they got their footing again, anyway. Right now they were still a little shy.
Maybe Lisette had a point about the therapist. After everything Nikki had lived through, of course they’d be traumatized and need some professional help. Gunter hadn’t wanted to push that topic, too uncomfortable and unsure of how to bring it up. But he had a feeling the Nikki he saw now was only a glimmer of what the mage was really like. Nikki was far too guarded.
That was a different problem for a different day, though. It wasn’t what Gunter wanted to figure out now. Right now, the question was something else entirely.
Did he dare take the risk? He wanted Nikki dearly, no question there. A little thrill went through Gunter every time Nikki touched him. And Gunter’s dragon always purred, happy to have Nikki nearby. Those two reactions combined were like neon fireworks, impossible to ignore.
What Gunter feared…might not come to pass. Some part of him was convinced that if Nikki chose him now, they’d only regret it later. Nikki had latched onto him so quickly without giving anyone else a chance, how could they not come to regret it? Gunter wasn’t sociable and bright like Nikki. But Nikki had the choice of other company, too, and it was Gunter they chose to be with. And those times together were always pleasant, something Gunter sought after. It might be all in his head that he would be a bad partner for Nikki. Or that Nikki might not want him in the same way. For all that Nikki was vivacious, they were also at times hard to read.
