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"Have you thought of resonance?" he asks out of nowhere.
I sit back on my haunches and stare up at him. "Of course I have thought about it. Every male has."
"Recently," Rokan asks, then waves a hand. "I should not have said anything."
But I surge to my feet, full of hope. My brother has a sense…a knowing. He sees things that are to be. "Is that what I feel?" I ask him, relieved and excited all at once. "Am I to resonate soon?"
He only shrugged, but I knew. And in the next moment, I recoiled in horror, because the only female at Croatoan that was not mated and of an age is…Tia.
Fickle, fickle Tia. "Not her?"
Rokan manages a small smile. "I see a beach."
That makes my happiness return. "Icehome. Of course." It makes sense. I know the females there. They are all good friends. There is Flor, who has a bright smile and a silly side to her. There is Day-see, who fusses over her mane and her clothing, but who has a sweetness to her spirit. And there is Sam, who is so beautiful to look upon that she makes my teeth ache for wanting, who is kind but remote, and who holds herself back. It is one of them, and I grin with sheer delight.
A mate. A resonance mate for me. I am thrilled. "I must go to Icehome immediately," I tell my brother, as if this is not obvious. "Today."
"Tomorrow," Rokan states. "Li-lah and the kits and I will go with you. It will be a pleasant outing."
Pleasant. Just thinking about Icehome Beach makes my mind fill with thoughts of the females. Of them smiling by the fire. Laughing. Tossing their hair. Of kissing games by firelight. If I could pick my mate, I would pick Sam, I think. She is older than me—they all are—but there is something about her that calls to me. She needs me. She needs someone. Even though she hides it well, she seems lost and alone. Flor is pretty and a good friend, but Sam is the one my cock grows hard for.
But if it is another, I will be pleased. The khui knows.
The khui always knows.
I touch my silent chest and try not to feel disappointment. Whoever I am to resonate to, it is not Sam. That leaves Flor or Day-see, then. They are both fine choices for a mate, I remind myself. Both good, strong, smart females. I quell my disappointment and follow Rokan and Li-lah as they bring their kits toward the beach. This is the first journey for all of them except Rokan, because the kits were too young. I want to see their eyes widen when they look out upon the great salt water, to watch it stretch out forever. It is a wondrous sight.
As we head toward the settlement, others come out to greet us. I am hugged by person after person, and the littlest kits climb on my legs, screaming their delight. I toss each one into the air, loving their shrieks of joy, because kits are always a pleasure. Soon, I think. Soon I will have some of my own. I cannot wait.
After I am hugged by the members of Strong Arm and their mates, and Lo-ren shows me their son K'then, I am greeted by Daisy, who kisses both of my cheeks and then squeezes them. She is attractive, but I find myself thinking of Sam instead. Flor throws herself into my arms, rubbing her knuckles over the top of my head and squealing with delight. "You freak," she cries, laughing. "You've gone and turned enormous when I looked away! How does that even happen?"
I blush, hugging her. Flor is a good friend, but her flattery makes me uncomfortable. "I feel the same as ever."
"Yeah, but you look…" She pushes her fingers together and then makes a smacking noise. At my confused expression, she explains. "That's a chef's kiss."
"It is…good, then?"
She winks at me and gives my bicep a squeeze. "Oh yeah, buddy. You're a snack."
Her words are so strange. "I…you have my thanks?"
Flor chuckles and takes my hand, dragging me toward the center of camp. "Come say hello to everyone. It's baby central around here, but I imagine it's like that back in your village too, hmm?"
She keeps up the conversation, telling me all about who has given birth in the last few years, and who is on their second resonance. I rub my chest, glancing around the camp as everyone bustles around us. Visitors are always a joy and normally I would bask in the attention, a joy of laughter and talk before life returns to hard work. Today, though, I feel strange. I think of Sam's hug, and how she felt as if she was pulling away the moment I touched her.
