Page 57 of Surrender


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“Em,” he called after me.

“I’m going to bed.” My shoulders felt heavy. My neck ached with tension. I was likely nearing a mind-splitting headache.

“Come on.” There was something in his voice that tugged at me, but I couldn’t turn around. I couldn’t let go of the hopelessness.

I left him standing in the foyer.

I kept walking. I didn’t want to talk through it, or process it. I didn’t want him to reassure me it was for the greater good. That it was for us. For our future. I knew all those things. And not a damn one of them made me feel any fucking better.

It was almost February. I was tired of the cold. It had seeped into my bones.

I sighed. “I miss the bungalow.” I stuffed my gloves in my pockets.

“Yeah. That was nice.”

Vaughn and I walked through the mall. He had a specific shopping list today, but he had been waiting to tell me what we were going to buy.

He lifted a sundress from a stand. “What about this?”

I looked at him. “It’s freezing outside. There is no way I’m wearing that.”

He stared at me.

“Oh.” I nodded. “It’s cute.” I threw the dress over my arm as I followed him, and we picked out an entirely new island wardrobe.

“You know Aubrey and I are going shopping this week for dresses for the gala.”

Vaughn studied a string bikini. “This.” He tossed it at me. I caught it clumsily.

“That’s next weekend?” he asked.

“Yes. You’re ok with going?” My arms were full of cute dresses, jumpsuits, and now a tiny bathing suit.

“About that.”

I winced. I didn’t want to back out. Not after what Aubrey had shared with me about Paul’s past and his connection to the children’s home.

“It is the topic of conversation this week in the flat.”

“What do you mean?” We kept our voices low.

“I want you to be consumed with your dress, hair, everything Aubrey is doing. Talk about that event incessantly whenever you’re in the flat. Have her come over and talk about it. Mention it to me in passing. Over dinner. Focus on how excited you are about it.”

“Ok, but why?”

He ushered me to the dressing rooms, choosing a changing cubicle at the very end of the corridor. “It’s our cover, Em.”

My eyes bulged. I almost dropped the clothes on the dressing room floor. “Next week? One week from today?” I eked.

He nodded. I’d seen determination in his eyes before, but nothing like this. There was a hardness surfacing. He was all business.

I pulled the curtain closed to try on the first set of dresses. As soon as I turned, Vaughn was behind me. He moved around me. He sat in the corner, watching me dress. It was oddly private in the back of the store.

“I didn’t know the when or how. And it’s fucking soon, but when Aubrey made the invitation, I knew it was the best option we had.”

My hands were shaking as I shimmied out of my jeans and reached for the black and pink tropical romper.

“How are we going to do it that soon?” I lifted my hair and Vaughn tied the halter behind my neck. We both looked at my reflection in the gilded mirror.

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