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“Air to ground weaponry.”
“Oh.”
“Yeah. It’s serious. These are billion-dollar contracts.”
My eyes lifted. “A billion dollars?”
“Many many billions. It’s the kind of money that’s inconceivable.”
She sank into her seat. “Please tell me about all the good you’re doing in the world. I need something inspiring.”
“I don’t know how inspiring I am. If I help one person, there are ten more right behind her who need even more. I can’t make a dent here.” I shook my head. “It feels like I’m spinning my wheels in that clinic.”
Greer sat forward. The weariness on her face lifted for a second. “While I’m at the Capitol working on weapons, you are out doing actual good. If you help one woman in that clinic, you’ve done something. Don’t let the numbers depress you.”
“How can they not? It’s hopeless. That’s how I felt when I left the clinic today. Hopeless.”
“Because, you have to believe in paying it forward. At least you used to.” She stared hard into my eyes. “It might not be in the same way, but for every woman you help, she’s going to turn around and pull up another woman behind her. Sometime in her life she’s going to do that.”
I felt guilt in my own cynicism. “You still think that, Pollyanna?”
She nodded. “Somebody has to. Because working with the assholes I work with will shred the humanity right out of you.”
“I need to remember that. Thank you.”
“Sure thing.” She smiled. “This is hard town to live in, but it does so much good. It’s just hard to see sometimes.”
I nodded. “I may not have figured anything else out, but I think I got that point.”
We finished dinner and the entire bottle of wine.
“Did I mention I have to finish my syllabus for class tomorrow?”
“What?” Greer laughed at the empty bottle of wine between us. “You have to work tonight?”
“How terrible would it be to show up without one on the first day?”
She started to clear the table. “Pretty terrible. Let’s clean this up and I’ll help you.”
“No. You’re already exhausted. You don’t have to do that.”
I rinsed my plate in the sink and stuck it in the dishwasher.
“How much do you have finished?” she asked.
I tried to think at what point in the semester I had stopped assigning chapters and cases. “I think I have through fall break. So really I just need to finish off November.”
She smiled. “That’s not too bad.”
“Exactly. I can finish it before bed.”
“You sure? I’m a little rusty, but I can look over some stuff for you. It might be fun to do together.”
I appreciated that she wanted to help. But I knew I could finish the work on my own, and maybe faster.
“I’m sure. It will take me an hour at most. I’ll work on it in bed until I’m done.”
She stretched her arms overhead. “If you don’t need me then I think I’m going to take a shower and go to bed. Tomorrow’s another early day.”
