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I fix her with a look.
“Marjorie, Patrick Swayze passed away. Even if he were alive, he’d be old.”
But my friend’s look just grows dreamy.
“Yeah, but he’s hot,” she sighs, “and Dirty Dancing is such a classic! I want a pink dress like the one Baby wore.”
Now it’s my turn to sigh and roll my eyes. But I put my hands on my hips and fix her with another look.
“Well, if you must know, my mom broke up with her boyfriend yesterday.”
Marj’s eyes go wide.
“Oh seriously? Oh my God, I’m so sorry. Was there a huge fight?”
I pause and think for a moment.
“No, not at all. If anything, my mom and Mason Caldwell were really calm. Almost like they were discussing bills or something.”
Marjorie nods, her eyes twinkling.
“Well, that’s weird but it also means that Mason Caldwell is back on the market!” she squeals. “Boy is that guy H-O-T!”
I grimace a bit because if my friend knew that I climaxed while watching him climax in the shower last night, she’d be absolutely horrified no matter how hot he is. Instead, I keep my secret to myself and merely offer her a limp grin.
“He is handsome, isn’t he?”
Marj nods furiously, but then she bites her lip and throws me a sideways look.
“Um, but Charity, speaking of your mom, what I saw last night makes a lot more sense now. I mean, what time did Rosanne and Mason break up?”
I look at her, stumped.
“I don’t know. Around 5? 6 p.m.?”
Marge nods knowingly.
“Yeah, the timeline all works out then because I saw Rosanne having dinner with another guy at the Fireside Bar and Grill downtown. Let’s just say they looked very cozy.”
I snap to attention. “Wait, what? With whom? OMG, this is so weird.”
“Harvey Pindot,” Marge says.
I stare at her, my mouth open.
“No.”
“Yes,” she nods knowingly as I grimace.
“OMG the old billionaire who lives in that mansion on the edge of town?”
My friend nods. “Yep. They were having a pretty intimate dinner, to be honest. Like feeding each other bites of steak. Honestly, your mom was practically pre-chewing Harvey’s food for him, they were so loved up, so I’m glad to hear she ended it with Mason first. But still, Harvey’s eighty! He needs someone to chew his food for him because he’s probably got a mouthful of dentures,” Marge adds with a grimace.
Meanwhile, all I can do is nod dumbly as my heart races. Inside, I’m shocked. Holy cow, my mom left Mason, a perfect specimen of a man, for the elderly, arthritic Harvey Pindot? The man who’s almost bent over double when he walks, and who only has two strands of white hair covering his bald pate? I almost can’t believe it. But it makes sense, doesn’t it? I mean, Mom wasn’t exactly mourning the loss of the relationship last night. Plus, it explains the sexy red dress she had on under her duster. I wonder if she let Harvey take it off her last night, seeing that she didn’t come home until the wee hours of the morning.
The total shock must show on my face because Marjorie pats my shoulder sympathetically. “Don’t worry, I’d be surprised too if I were in your shoes. I mean no offense, but everyone in town thinks your mom is really something. Rosanne’s pretty but she’s out there.”
I bite my lip. It’s not the first time someone has said how they feel about my mom’s dating habits right to my face. I usually roll my eyes and let their opinion slide right off me, but sometimes, even I wish I had a different mom.
“Rosanne just has her own way of going about things,” I say in a grim voice. “I mean, I can’t speak to what’s going on in her head, but as long as she’s happy, so am I.”
Marjorie nods quickly.
“Oh of course, I agree totally. Everyone has their own way of finding joy, and there’s nothing wrong with being interested in Harvey Pindot. He’s not whom I would choose, but to each their own.”
With that, I nod and turn away. Focus, focus, the voice in my head urges. With a vengeance, I grab a broom and begin to sweep the café furiously, pushing chairs and tables out of the way while I get the place to sparkle.
But four hours later, I still can’t wrap my head around these new developments in my life. Okay, so it’s more my mom’s dating life, but still! Sometimes, it’s really weird to have a bombshell as a mother. Most moms are at home baking cookies and making dinner, but it turns out that my mom is likely breaking up with a guy only to throw herself into the arms of another one mere minutes later.
The rest of my shift is uneventful. I make my way home and exhausted, toss my keys into the dish by the door before nudging the front door closed with my toe. The house feels empty, which is a relief. I don’t think I could take any more crazy revelations right now. But still, how can my mom be dating Mr. Pindot? Unable to resist, I open my phone and google the billionaire. A grimace comes over my face. Ick. Harvey is every bit the pale, wrinkly man I’ve seen in the past, and it turns out he has a prominent birthmark on his scalp too.
