AllFreeNovel
Share Us
My heart clutches with pain.
“No, not yet.”
“Why not?” she queries.
I take a deep breath as tears spring to my eyes.
“He doesn’t want a child. After the picnic, all he could talk about was how perfect and happy you and your family looked. I’m not going to get into specifics, but let’s just say he made it very clear that he’s not looking for a family himself.”
Patty is silent. She says nothing for so long that I think the call might have disconnected, but eventually, she speaks. “I’m not so sure, Simona. I mean, a lot of guys don’t realize how much fatherhood suits them until it actually happens to them. Besides, I think he was just grouchy. Why don’t you give him another chance? Maybe he just woke up on the wrong side of the bed.”
I shake my head.
“No, it was more than that, Patty. He really went off, and I’m not going to repeat what he said because he was saying things about your family. I mean, he wasn’t criticizing your parenting skills or anything like that,” I add hastily. “But he was saying things like he’s so glad he’s not you, he’s so glad he’s not your husband, he doesn’t want the responsibility, yada yada yada. It was ugly.”
Patty nods and is silent.
“I get it. And I know how devastating that must have been for you to hear, especially if you’re in love with him. But this is James’s child, sweetie. If you’re keeping the baby, I think you should tell him,” she ventures gently.
My heart thunders in my chest.
“You’re right. I think I do want the baby,” I say in a soft voice. “Isn’t that so crazy?”
Patty immediately shakes her head, brown curls bouncing. “No, not at all, Simona. Meeting the right man often brings out a woman’s maternal instinct, so I think it’s very natural that you want this child.”
I let out a choked laugh.
“The right man? But James has made it crystal clear that he doesn’t want to be a father.”
Patty merely smiles gently.
“I wouldn’t be so sure,” she opines. “Tell him, sweetie. Maybe not at this very second, but I don’t think you have anything to lose.”
“Except the fact that he doesn’t want kids,” I say in a sour tone.
Patty merely chuckles again.
“You never know what will happen,” she says. “Now take care of yourself, okay? Only one cup of coffee or tea per day, and not too many processed foods. Call me if you want to talk again, alright?”
I hiccup a bit and wipe my eyes.
“Thanks, Patty. Yes, got it, and I totally appreciate you, girlfriend.”
She merely smiles gently once more.
“Love you.”
“Love you,” I mumble in return. But after hanging up, my heart drops. What do I do now that I’m pregnant by a man who doesn’t want a family? Unfortunately, the future for me and my child is ominous, to say the least.
10
James
* * *
I feel like total shit. I keep replaying all the awful things I said to Simona last night, and guilt gnaws at my gut until I’m physically nauseous. I was such a fucking asshole yesterday. Who does that? Am I really so petty that I’d ruin a one-year-old’s playdate by whining about her parents? I thought I had changed, but obviously not.
My coffee’s going cold as I stare sightlessly at my computer monitor. Then, letting out an angry growl, I get up and stalk to my brother’s office.
“James,” Luke says mildly as I enter. “You look like hell.”
“I feel like it too,” I rasp.
“I’m sorry to hear that. Are you sick? You were pretty off yesterday during the picnic.”
I close my eyes briefly because his concern makes me feel even worse about the way I behaved. “No, nothing like that. I was just being an asshole to everyone. I want to apologize to you and Patty for that.”
His eyebrows raise, and he shrugs. “Apology accepted, little brother, but it’s no skin off my nose. You were behaving oddly but it wasn’t like you were a complete and fucking idiot or anything. Why, what’s up?”
I sigh before dropping like a bag of bricks into the chair in front of his desk.
“I said the most unforgivable things to Simona.”
My brother’s brows raise.
“Like …?”
I sigh heavily.
“It doesn’t matter,” is my resigned sentence. “I fucking suck and I deserve what’s coming to me.”
My brother thinks for a moment.
“Well, if it’s that bad, then I’d try to get in front of it. No sense in waiting for the storm to land.”
I squint a bit.
“You think?”
“Hell yeah,” Luke says, leaning back in his chair. “Trust me, I’ve been married for a while now. It’s better to nip things in the bud before your woman loses her head and starts screaming.”
Resolved, I get up.
“Fuck,” is all I bite out before striding to the door.
“Good luck!” my brother calls after me.
