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Strand smiles sheepishly. “I said, well, that throws everything out.”
“What does it throw out?”
They are physically closer without either having consciously decided to be. She has to tilt her head just a little to make eye contact; she’s tall, but he still has a few inches on her. Strand has lashes any girl would die for. She notices that, notices the fineness of his nose, focuses on random details as her heart beats fast for him, and faster still from panic.
Why did I do that?
“It throws out . . . Well, here’s the thing. I’ve been talking to some of the guys who are getting called up or enlisting, and almost all of them say they’ll write home to some girl. But I don’t really have a girl to write to.”
“You won’t be writing to Hillary?”
“Hillary?” A confused frown. “Her? No, she and I . . . I mean, we had one date. But she’s seeing someone else. And anyway, we were always just friends.”
So much for Jenou’s gossip.
“I see.” What she saw was a boy even more handsome up close than at a distance, which she thinks must be unusual—didn’t most people look better from a distance? And didn’t most people think about enlisting in a war rather than just blurting it out like a ninny?
He’s panicked her, that’s what it is. He and Jenou. The fear of being left behind. Nonsense, all of it—a whirl of motivations, none of which can be pulled into the light of day and examined in any reasonable way as long as she’s looking at the line of his chin, and the sculpted look of his lips, and just the general large and strong and yet gentle feeling of . . .
Take it back, Rio. You have to take it back.
Is he seeing her up close now and noticing her nose is too small? She fights the urge to touch her dark hair, which is probably sticking up in some unattractive way. Why didn’t she check her hair in the bathroom mirror of the diner?
She feels she might faint. It’s all too much, way, way too fast. She’s confused, her thoughts zooming like rockets, leaving random trails of sparks and smoke and . . .
“So, anyway,” Strand goes on, struggling with every word, “I know we don’t really know each other all that well. But I was wondering whether you might go see a movie with me tomorrow night. Then I could write to you when I’m away. But now if you’re going away as well, so . . .” He looks exhausted suddenly, as if he’s used up the last of his courage getting the conversation this far.
“I imagine soldiers can write to each other,” Rio says, sounding chirpy and false to herself. “I mean, wherever you are, and wherever I am, we could still write letters back and forth. Couldn’t we?”
What are you doing? Enlisting? Or going on a date?
But she can hear Jenou’s voice in her head, and that voice says, “Oh come on now, honey; you know exactly what you’re doing.”
Rio’s suggestion gives Strand an infusion of energy, perhaps a little too much energy, as he practically shouts, “Yes! Yes, we could, couldn’t we? After all, it’s not as if you’ll be off in the trenches somewhere. They’ll keep the girls here in the States. Or perhaps send some to England, but in any case, you’ll be able to write.” He claps his hands, then seems surprised by those very hands, stares at them for a second in confusion, sticks them into his pockets, and goes on. “We could compare notes on . . . on army life. Of course we could. Why not?”
“And it would make sense for us to know each other a little better before embarking on this correspondence,” Rio says.
Embarking on this correspondence?
That sends his eyebrows up.
“Yes, that was an interesting phrase,” Rio admits ruefully. “I meant, a movie, like you said, we could go to a movie.”
“Yes! That’s it, of course, because I did mention a movie, didn’t I? Tomorrow night. That’s what you meant, wasn’t it?”
“Of course!” she says, and it comes out as a squeak.
Well-raised boy that he is, Strand walks her the rest of the way home, but the only conversation takes place between voices in Rio’s own head. She has just upended her entire life based on a diner conversation with her best friend and an awkward exchange with a boy she barely knows.
Now, right now, here at her front door where she must say good evening, is the time to take it all back.
But I do want to go to a movie with him.
I do want to.
“Good night, Strand.”
“I’ll come by at seven, if that’s all right with you.”
