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“It’s beautiful,” I said as I explored every curve and line. I looked up to see Mav watching me intently. “You’re beautiful,” I whispered as his dark eyes held mine. He didn’t say anything, but the arm wrapped around my waist tightened imperceptibly and then he was drawing me up against his chest for another kiss. We were both breathless and desperately rubbing against each other for relief when he pulled back.
“I need you,” he finally said and I heard the tremor in his voice. For any other man I had no doubt the words would have been easy ones to say, but for Mav, I suspected they cost him so much more.
I leave so I don’t get left.
I couldn’t make sense of what could have happened to this beautiful man to make him think I would ever turn away from him, but I knew that was exactly what he was afraid of. I clasped his face with both my hands and told him the one thing I knew he needed to hear more than anything else in that moment.
“Yes.”
Chapter Eleven
Mav
Yes.
Logically I had known that would be Eli’s answer since everything he’d just said was proof that he needed me as much as I needed him, but hearing the word released the stranglehold I had on my emotions.
I would get this moment with him. This one night.
It would be enough to sustain me when I was forced to let him go for good. Because I wasn’t foolish enough to believe Eli really wanted me. He wanted something I could give him in this moment…escape, relief, the ability to forget – I wasn’t really sure which and I didn’t care. But eventually he would do what all the others had done and turn his back on me. He’d be kinder about it, of course. He’d say he was too busy with school or family or he wouldn’t say anything at all and I’d be forced to watch him silently withdraw from me.
It didn’t matter because long before that happened, I’d figure out how to do what I hadn’t been able to these past three days – walk away from him.
I managed to use one hand to work Eli’s shirt off of him before I lowered him back down to the bed. But unlike before, he didn’t look tense and on edge. Instead he just lay there and let me have my fill of him. He was definitely a lean guy, but he also had considerably more muscle definition than I’d expected. I’d had the sense to turn on the wall lamp next to the bed before I’d climbed into the shower so even as darkness fell outside, I could still make out his features and the warm hue of his bronzed skin. I let my hands skim over his sides and relished in the way he sucked in his breath as I touched him. I teased his nipples a little bit before I leaned over him and ran my tongue across one of them. Eli let out a gasp and then I felt his fingers thread through my hair. He held on to me as I nipped at the turgid flesh before turning my attention to the other one. I explored the rest of his torso with my hands and quickly followed with my tongue. By the time I reached his belly button, Eli was squirming beneath me and trying to guide me farther south. I dipped my tongue into his navel before letting my mouth drag over the bulge that was still covered by his jeans.
“Mav,” Eli grunted as he tried to increase the pressure where I was nuzzling him.
“Take yourself out,” I ordered as I sat up and reached behind me to work his shoes and socks off. There was no hesitation as Eli fumbled to get his pants open. His cock was so hard he had to gently pry it free of the confines of his pants and underwear. I helped him work the clothes completely off, but was careful not to touch him. Once he was naked, I knelt between his spread legs and reached down to lift them so they were bent at the knee, his feet flat on the bed.
“Show me where you want my mouth,” I said softly as I began stroking myself through the athletic pants I’d thrown on after my shower. The loose fabric did nothing to hide my erection and Eli was clearly more focused on it rather than my words because he didn’t react at first. When I stopped stroking myself, Eli lifted his eyes to mine in confusion and I repeated my order. His cheeks flushed with color even as his hand reached for his cock. He fisted himself and began slow drags up and down his shaft as his eyes fell back to my hand which I was once again rubbing along my stiffness. I didn’t miss how he matched his strokes to mine.
