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“Do what?” I asked.
“Make me want something I can’t have.”
My insides lit up, but before I could even move, he was pushing past me. “You’re not gay, are you?” he asked when he stopped near the door.
“No,” I admitted.
“Are you bi?” he asked.
I began walking towards him, not missing the way he tensed up and his breathing ticked up.
“I don’t know what I am,” I said softly.
Ethan backed up until his back hit the wall next to the door. “That…that kiss wasn’t real,” he said half-heartedly just before I reached him.
“Yes, it was,” I murmured right before I bent my head and sealed my mouth over his.
Chapter Twelve
Ethan
I kept trying to tell myself it wasn’t real, but the argument held no water because the sensation of Cain’s mouth moving over mine as he kissed me was undeniable.
I’d never felt anything like it.
Not even with Eric.
Unlike in the alley, I didn’t wait for Cain to tell me to kiss him back. I greeted his seeking tongue with fervor and followed it back into his own mouth as he drew back just a little bit. I didn’t know what to do with my hands because I didn’t want to ruin what was happening by touching him if that wasn’t what he wanted. But Cain took the decision away from me a moment later when he grabbed my hands and pressed them against the wall next to my head. He laced our fingers together as he pressed his body against mine. I was at his mercy and I didn’t care.
I welcomed it.
I barely felt the hardness of the wall against my back. I didn’t hear the low din of the fan circulating air around the small room. I didn’t register anything but Cain’s mouth, his body, his smell.
I craved to touch him. To once again feel his hot skin beneath my fingers. There’d been a point when he’d kissed me in that alley where I’d forgotten all about the danger we were in and I’d clung to him out of need rather than fear.
A moan fell from my lips when I felt his groin brush mine.
He was hard.
It made no sense, which was why I knew I needed to stop. I’d been ruled by passion before and that was nothing like this. What would happen if I let this man take what was left of me…the few parts of me Eric hadn’t managed to reach with his fists or his words?
But I couldn’t force myself to tear my mouth from his. I couldn’t make myself tug my hands free of his and I couldn’t stop myself from canting my hips so my stiff cock could brush his through the too many layers of clothing separating us.
The simmering desire exploded into something a thousand times more intense when Cain suddenly released my hands and clasped my face with his hands and took complete control of the kiss, me, everything. I couldn’t stop myself from wrapping my fingers around his wrists where he was holding onto me. I needed something to ground me, to keep me with him because it just felt that fucking good.
When we were both forced to come up for air, Cain hung there, his forehead pressed to mine, his mouth just centimeters from mine. He was breathing hard and his skin felt like it was on fire. I held there, unmoving, as I tried to get control of my lust.
“Ethan,” Cain whispered. “I need you to do something for me.”
“Anything,” I said without hesitation.
“I need you to touch me, but I need you to promise you’ll stop if I ask you to.”
“I will,” I said softly. “I swear it.”
He nodded against me. I was surprised when he kept his forehead pressed to mine as he moved my hands down to his waist. His T-shirt was untucked so he used one hand to pull it up just a little before placing one of my hands on his waist. After he maneuvered my other hand to where he wanted it, he released his hold on me and placed his hands next to my head. His eyes were on my hands.
His skin was hot and tight to the touch. And soft. Much softer than I would have expected. I slowly slid my hands up his waist just a little, but stilled when I felt him tense up.
“Keep going,” he murmured.
I left one hand where it was and moved the other. Within a fraction of a second, my fingers skimmed over a raised patch of skin just below his armpit. I didn’t focus on the scar as I let my hand travel back down to his stomach. But as soon as I reached his abs, I felt another scar. When I moved my other hand, it quickly encountered a third scar, then a fourth. I finally let my finger follow the complete path of one of the scars. It was several inches long. Tears stung my eyes as I realized what they were.
