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“Aleks, what I said earlier about wanting you inside of me… it doesn’t need to be tonight and if it’s something you don’t want at all—”
That was as much as I got out because he raised himself up and kissed me. His arms went around my neck so I wrapped mine around his waist.
His kiss rocked my world. When he pulled back to let me catch my breath he said, “James, I love when you explain things to me and let me choose, but you can stop talking now. I’ve chosen.”
I smiled when he kissed me again, his tongue dominantly controlling mine. We were both breathless by the time we separated again. In true Aleks fashion, insecurity swamped him as he blurted, “You have to tell me what to do so I don’t hurt you even a little, James. And if I’m doing it wrong or you want me to stop, you have to promise you’ll tell me. I couldn’t… I couldn’t live with myself if I hurt you—”
“Promise,” I interjected before kissing him. I shifted on the bed so I could reach the nightstand drawer. I grabbed a condom and lube and set them on top of the nightstand. The sight of them rendered Aleks mute.
“We can get tested tomorrow when we go into the city,” I said, since the idea of Aleks bare inside of me was already taking on a life of its own. “But until then, we need to use condoms because I haven’t been tested in a while.”
Aleks nodded. “I got tested after I went to live with Dante and he explained all that to me. All the tests came back okay.”
I nodded and said, “Okay, then you don’t need to get tested again unless you’ve been with someone since then.”
Aleks shook his head violently. “No… no. Just you, James.”
I grinned at how worried he looked. “I’ll get tested tomorrow and then we can decide together what happens next… if we use condoms, if we do this again, if I can get my mouth on that beautiful dick of yours…”
He’d pretty much turned a shade of red by the time I pulled him so he was lying on top of me. It took only seconds for him to get back into the act of kissing me and then his mouth was exploring my chest as his hands trailed down my sides. I lifted my hands above my head when Aleks’s mouth sought out the sensitive skin of my armpit. He nuzzled the hair there, then inhaled deeply.
“God, you smell so good,” he said unabashedly as he sealed his mouth over mine. For all the trauma Aleks had experienced, he was such an open and honest lover. His eyes were, more often than not, gateways to his soul, and they were what I used to gauge how he was feeling about something.
Aleks let his sinful mouth slide down my neck, then my chest. But he hesitated when he got to the buckle on my pants. I was about to tell him I could take the jeans off myself, but then his nimble fingers were working the belt free, then the button and zipper. I held my tongue when he paused, his gaze staring at my erection, which was pressing against the material. His tongue darted out to wet his lips and it was all I could do not to groan at the sight.
I wouldn’t lie and say I hadn’t thought about how his mouth would feel on my dick, but it wasn’t a game changer. In fact, there really wasn’t anything that would change anything for me. If all Aleks wanted to do for the time we had left together was hold my hand, I’d give him exactly that.
Aleks’s hand tentatively reached out to stroke the outline of my cock.
“You really want this,” he said bluntly when he looked up at me.
His surprise didn’t bother me at all. I knew it wasn’t about him not believing what I’d said earlier… it was just taking his brain a little longer to catch up. His heart hadn’t needed proof when I’d told him how much I wanted him inside of me, but his brain clearly hadn’t been able to conceive the idea. But seeing how my body couldn’t deny my words seemed to cause that final wall between me and Aleks to come crashing down. He crawled up my body and kissed me. “I’m sorry.”
I knew what he was apologizing for.
He saw it as a lack of trust on his part.
I didn’t.
“Don’t be,” I said with a shake of my head. “Just make love to me, Aleks.”
He nodded and kissed me softly, then moved down my body again. His moves were a little more confident as he pulled my pants and underwear off. His eyes strayed to my cock as he worked, and I could see the occasional flicker of fear in his eyes, but I didn’t try to reassure him that I wasn’t going to throw him down and fuck him.
