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“And the mom and her kids?”
“They’re okay. I was getting the kids out of the car while the suspect was engaged with other officers. The suspect took a shot at us. I had the car for cover but he managed to nick me. He was killed.”
I let my hands slide down his throat and over his chest.
“No one would tell me anything and then my phone’s battery died and I started imagining the worst…” I whispered.
“There’s a lot of red tape when officers are involved in shootings,” Cam said as he cupped my cheek. “I’m sorry, Ford. I didn’t know.”
I shook my head. “No, you were right. How could you have? I’ve pushed you away so many times and I’ve said things—”
I couldn’t finish the sentence because it just hurt too much. And it brought up too many questions I wasn’t prepared to answer. I just wanted the here and now and while I knew I couldn’t use that as an excuse tomorrow when I had to rejoin the real world, I would cling to it for tonight. I dropped my eyes to Ford’s chest and then reached for the buttons on his shirt. He’d already given me permission to take it off with his comment about me owning him, but my fingers still shook as I hesitated. Things had happened so quickly the last time we’d been together that I hadn’t even had time to process what was happening. But now that I’d slowed things down so dramatically and the desire had eased a little, I was very aware that I was really going to do this.
I was going to touch another man and I was doing it with a clear mind.
Cam kept caressing my thighs and ass as I carefully unbuttoned his shirt. The shirt was clean and crisp, so I could only assume he’d changed into a fresh uniform at some point after being treated at the hospital. I separated the plackets and let my hands roam over the soft black undershirt beneath. I looked at Cam to see him watching me with understanding eyes.
He was waiting for me to back out. To pull away like I had so many other times.
That wouldn’t happen tonight.
But what about tomorrow? And the next day?
I ignored the question because I couldn’t answer it.
Here and now. That was what I needed to focus on. I knew I couldn’t put the rest of that stuff in my little box, but I set it aside for now.
“Sit up,” I urged with a little tug on Cam’s shirt. I heard him let out a whoosh of air, then he did as I asked. His arms went around my waist and his mouth sought out mine. I happily returned his kiss. When he pulled back, I carefully worked the button-up shirt off his shoulders. I saw the bandage once he slipped his hands free of the sleeves.
“Does it hurt?” I asked as I let my fingers trail along the edge of the dressing. His undershirt sleeve covered the top part of it.
“A little,” Cam said.
I dropped my lips to the spot where his neck met his shoulder and kissed him.
“Was this the first time you’ve been hurt in the line of duty?”
“No,” he said.
“Where else?” I asked. I leaned back, expecting Cam to just show me any old injuries. But instead, he took my hand in his and guided it down to his belly. I let him slip my hand beneath his shirt and felt a scar almost immediately. It was just to the left of his belly button. I gently caressed the raised flesh. When he went to move my hand again, I swallowed hard.
How many times had he been hurt on the job?
This time, he moved my hand to his upper back. The next scar was on his shoulder blade.
“That one’s from a knife,” Cam said. “I’ve got another scar but it’s a lot farther south.”
The smile in his voice had me glancing up at him. I realized he was trying to lighten the mood and get us back to a better place.
Something I was really grateful for.
“Oh yeah?” I asked. Inside, I felt a little sick at the thought of him having gotten so close to losing his life so many times, but I tried not to let that show on the outside.
He brushed his mouth over mine. “I might let you convince me to show you,” he said. His little grin against my lips helped ease some of my tension.
I smiled and kissed him, then tugged at the hem of his shirt. Cam carefully lifted his arms and I gently got the shirt off him. I’d gotten a chance to kiss his chest the last time we’d been together, but I’d been so frantic with need that I hadn’t really appreciated it. He had some dark hair on his chest that was smattered with some gray hairs here and there. He was toned and muscular but had a longer torso compared to my more compact one. My fingers sought out the line of hair that went from his navel to points south. Cam groaned and bucked up beneath me. I could feel his cock pushing against his pants. I let my eyes drift lower and saw that the head was just beneath the waistband of the material. I rubbed him through the fabric and drank in the sounds of his pleasure. He’d let me touch him like this the night I’d fucked him, but I hadn’t known what I was doing.
