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She swallowed hard, forced down the food. The fact that she’d been right—that Alex was attracted to her—made her head feel as though it was going to explode. Maybe Jo was right. Maybe it had been her defensive attitude that had turned men off in the past and not the few extra pounds she’d been carrying. Which had always been her excuse.
She took another sip of the rich, full cabernet that was going a long way to mellowing her out. But the wine didn’t seem to be having the same effect on Alex, who’d glowered at her throughout the entire meal—as if she’d committed a crime rather than simply kissed him.
She risked a quick glance at him. He was still watching her with that same implacable frown on his face, that penetrating blue gaze of his impossible to read. And it occurred to her she hadn’t fully thought through her plan. She had the mind-numbing confirmation that he was attracted to her. The question now was what was she going to do about it?
Her heart pounding in her chest, she set her fork down with an abrupt movement, and the sound of metal clattering against fine china echoed in the still night air.
He gave her half-empty plate a narrowed glance. “That’s all you’re going to eat?”
“It was delicious, thank you. I think that’s about all I can handle.”
“All right.” He laid his fork down with a deliberate movement and pushed his plate away. “Let’s talk about what happened.”
Gladly. She took another sip of her wine to fortify herself and set the glass down.
“That kiss shouldn’t have happened.”
She was ready for that one. “Why not?”
“I’m much more experienced than you, Isabel. I’m not interested in relationships—in fact, mine never last longer than a few months, and the women I date are well aware of that.”
“So?”
He did a double take at the belligerent note in her voice. “You’re also probably still in shock from what happened today.”
“I’m absolutely fine,” she countered. “In fact, I feel like I have more clarity right now than I’ve ever had in my life.”
He sat back in his chair, his gaze on her face. “What kind of clarity?”
She twisted the stem of her wineglass on the table, watching the bloodred liquid shimmer in the candlelight. “That was my worst fear today. Facing it—getting through it—” she paused, looking up at him “—it’s made me realize how much of my life I’ve lived in fear...how many times I’ve not gone after what I wanted because I was afraid I wouldn’t get it or it would explode in my face.”
He gave a wary nod. “That’s a good realization.”
She shook her head. “I’m not looking for a relationship, Alex.” A husky laugh escaped her. “In fact, that’s the last thing I need right now.”
His eyes narrowed. “Then what are you looking for?”
“I don’t want to live with any more regrets.”
He shook his head, a wry smile curving his lips. “You’re twenty-five, Isabel. How many regrets can you have?”
She took a deep breath, meeting his gaze head-on. “I will regret it if I walk away from tonight without exploring the attraction that’s between us.”
A muscle jumped in his jaw. He sat there completely silent, staring at her. “I’m not sure you know what you’re doing.”
She shook her head. “I know exactly what I’m doing.”
A long moment passed; it might have been four, five seconds, she wasn’t sure. All she knew was that she was holding her breath, sure at one point he was going to reject her. The warm night air pressed so heavily against her lungs she thought they would burst. And then something shifted, morphed on the air between them. And she got her answer in the darkening of his eyes.
He stood up and held out a hand. “Let’s go enjoy the view, then.”
CHAPTER FOUR
THE SULTRY NIGHT AIR, so quiet and still as they stood at the railing and took in the cityscape, seemed to envelop Izzie in a world so far removed from her normal life that she could almost believe that it was. That it was just the two of them who existed and this incredible panoramic view of London with its lights twinkling across the water had been created for them and them alone.
That what felt like a defining moment in her life was utterly, absolutely the right thing to do.
“You must spend so much time out here,” she said to Alex, shaking her head. “It’s breathtaking.”
A wry smile curved his mouth. “It’s my second office when I’m in London. When the weather is good...”
Izzie tried to focus as he pointed out the London landmarks to her, stopping to give her a bit of history on each, but the anticipation coursing through her veins made her feel weak-kneed. Light-headed.
“What’s that?” She pointed at a series of small structures stretching across the water on either side of a bridge.
“That’s the Thames barrier.”
“Those white things that look like little Sydney Opera Houses?”
He moved behind her and directed her fingers toward the circular structures she’d been looking at. “Those.”
Her temperature spiked dramatically as the hard, warm length of him brushed against her back. “Right,” she murmured. “That’s what I thought.”
He didn’t move away, but dropped his hands to the railing instead, resting them on either side of her. Her heartbeat sped up.
“Flooding has become an issue for London over the years. Water levels have been continuously rising and threatening the city. In one of the big floods, many years back, hundreds of people died.”
“Really?” She could barely breathe, so distracted was she by the pulses of electricity his big, warm body was sending through hers.
“Are you listening?” He moved his lips closer to her ear. “There’s going to be a quiz later, you know.”
“Later?” She gave up all pretext of paying attention when his hand brushed the weight of her hair aside and he set his lips to the sensitive skin at the nape of her neck.
“Mmm...one kiss was not nearly enough, Isabel.”
Her legs felt as though she’d been through one too many Spin classes. Weaker still when he pressed his mouth to the sensitive junction between her neck and shoulder. The question was, did she have the guts to go through with this? For all her bravado, she’d only ever had one lover—and not a good one at that—in her college boyfriend. What if she disappointed Alex with her lack of experience?
“I can see the smoke coming out of your ears,” he murmured against her skin. “Stop thinking so much.”
Which was exactly what she needed to do. She’d been thinking so much her entire life she felt as though she’d been watching it from the sidelines. And if there was anything this crazy day had taught her, it was that life was tenuous. Fragile. And it could be taken from you at any moment. So best to jump in and take your chances.
Taking a deep breath, she turned around and met the questioning intensity of his deep blue gaze. Felt the heat—oh dear Lord—the heat of those sizzling good looks up close. The hard planes of his face that made him look formidable...until he smiled. That square jaw with its delicious indentation that made a woman want to put her lips to it. The sensuous, full mouth... It was all a bit heart-stopping.
And incredibly difficult to find her voice. In the end, she didn’t try. Just went up on tiptoes, lifted her chin, and brought her lips a hairbreadth away from his in silent invitation.
Something flickered in his eyes. “Can I ask you a question?”
She nodded.
“Are those glasses for distance?”
She blinked. “Yes.”
He reached up and plucked them from her face. “Then I guess you won’t be needing them.” Her breath caught, strangled in her throat as he set the glasses down on the railing beside them. “This is about to get up close and very personal.”
Oh God. Her heart raced in her chest as he reached up and captured her jaw in his palm, his gaze following his thumb as it swept across her cheek and over the surface of her bottom lip. “You have the most amazing mouth,” he murmured, exerting a slight downward pressure so she opened for him. “It’s the kind of mouth a man couldn’t resist even if he wanted to.”
Which was good because if he didn’t kiss her right now, she was going to die. Transfixed, she watched as he lowered his head, her lashes fluttering down as he angled his mouth over hers in a caress so light, so sensuous, it made her whole body go weak. Her hands came up to balance her against the hard wall of his chest, a sigh escaping her throat as he explored, tasted every centimeter of her lips, getting intimately acquainted in a way that made her toes curl.
The kiss seemed to go on forever and ever, a leisurely tasting that neither of them seemed inclined to end. “This needs to go,” he muttered, reaching up to unclasp her hair so it fell in a heavy swath down her back.
He drew back and raked his gaze over her. “You also have the most sensational hair.”
“I almost cut it all off recently.” She’d thought it might look more professional on-camera.
He reached out to twist one of her curls around his finger. “Don’t ever, ever do that.”
