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Izzy sat up, pulling one of the pillows in front of her. “You’ve got to realize I’m way too old for you.”
“You’re wrong.” How were he and Clay going to convince her that her age didn’t matter?
“Please, let me finish. This was only supposed to be for fun and pleasure, not forever. You’re wonderful men. I couldn’t ask for better. But you can’t waste your life on someone my age.”
“Waste our life on you?” He grabbed her hand, wanting to help her to let go of her doubts. “Izzy, you can’t say you don’t have feelings for us. We can see it in your eyes.”
Jay cupped her chin. “We can tell it in the way you make love to us.”
She shook her head. “I shouldn’t have let this go so far. I’m sorry, but it just isn’t possible. You’re not getting it guys so let me try again. I will not allow you to waste your life on me.”
Frustration exploded inside him. “That doesn’t make any sense, Izzy. You mean the world to us—to me and Jay. I know this is fast, but that doesn’t make it any less real. I am in love with you.”
“And so am I,” Jay said firmly. “Tell us the truth. Do you love us or not?”
She closed her eyes and sighed. “Whether I do or don’t doesn’t change the facts. We have to end this now. Please, let me get up. I want to take a shower.”
“Okay, sweetheart.” If he and Jay pushed her now it would likely upset her even more. He knew she needed a moment to collect her thoughts. “But we’re not ending anything. We have more to talk about.”
She looked down at her hands, without a doubt to avoid his and Jay’s eyes. “I’m not going to change my mind.”
“I just can’t believe that, Izzy.” He knew that they had their work cut out for them to turn her around, but he would do whatever it took to make sure she did.
Jay had the same determination on his face. “If you want a shower, go ahead, sweetheart.” His brother stood, holding out his hand to help her off the bed. “We can talk after.”
She swung her legs off the mattress and retrieved her clothes. Her eyes were brimming with unshed tears. Why is she holding back? What else is she afraid of? He didn’t believe it was just about their age difference, which didn’t mean a damn thing to him and Jay.
When she closed the door to the en suite, he looked at his brother. “What can we do?”
“I don’t know, but I know I can’t live without her. That’s not an option.” Jay began dressing.
“No, it’s not for me either. She’s everything I’ve ever wanted, bro—everything we’ve both wanted.” He left the bed and grabbed his clothes off the floor. “But you saw how she reacted when we told her how we felt.”
“Yes, but you and I both can tell there is something more that she’s not admitting to.”
“I think we should focus on getting to the bottom of it, Jay.” Buttoning his shirt, he heard the water of the shower turn on. He looked at the door, wondering what Izzy was so afraid of. “No matter what it takes, bro, she belongs with us.”
* * * *
Izzy closed her eyes and placed her head under the shower, feeling the warm water mingle with her tears and washing them away. “I wish I could wash away my feelings that easily. Damn it. Why did I let this happen?”
Clay and Jay’s words continued to replay again and again in her mind. Her heart had melted. She hadn’t been expecting it, but deep down she longed to hear those three special words because she had fallen in love with them. Clay had spoken first. “I love you so much.” Followed by Jay. “And I love you, too.”
But after hearing their admissions of love, she knew it could never be. It wasn’t possible.
“Why did I allow myself to fall in love with them? And now what am I going to do?”
Izzy knew one thing—she couldn’t let them waste their lives on her. She had to be strong, even if her heart was ripping apart.
How was she going to make them see that it could never work between them? She wasn’t sure but knew they would be better off without her.
And her life was good enough. She had Gabby. She had her two best friends. She had a career. And in many ways, she was happy. I’m just not meant to have true love.
She thought about the asshole, her ex-husband. They’d been married for ten years, and all of it difficult. He was a selfish lover. Wham-bam and not even a thank-you-ma’am.
She’d always wanted a family, dreamed of a house full of children. But he’d never wanted any. In fact, the day she’d told him about being pregnant with Gabby he’d stormed out of their house. When he’d come back he was drunk off his ass. That’s when she’d decided not to have any more children with him, knowing he would make a horrible father. Even today, the strained relationship the asshole had with Gabby proved that fact. They barely spoke, except on birthdays and Christmas.
Oh God, Gabby. What will she think?
