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Harrison and Frankie left shortly after that. Coburn went off to deal with a few emails before bed while she stowed the rest of the dishes in the kitchen, then took a hot shower.
The punishing spray helped temper her emotions. She dried off and slid a nightshirt over her head. Attempted to channel a Zen she didn’t feel. But the minute Coburn walked into the room, her shoulders rose to her ears. His expression said his patience level with her was about a two out of ten. Hers was hovering right around there.
He slid his gaze over the nightshirt. “I thought we decided that was going in the garbage.”
“You decided that.” She walked past him, headed for the bottle of body lotion on the dresser. He snagged an arm around her and hauled her into him. “We also decided your hot-and-cold routine was finished.”
“I wasn’t aware my choice of night clothing fell into that category.”
He made a sound at the back of his throat. She pushed at his arm, but he sat down and hauled her onto his lap instead. “That kind of behavior is going to get you spanked.”
The threat would usually have turned her on. Tonight it made her want to scratch his eyes out. She fixed her gaze on his. “Let me go, Coburn. Tonight is not the night to push me.”
He raked his gaze over her face. “Why? You were in a perfectly good mood when I got home.”
“I would still be in a good mood if you could accept the fact I just don’t want your hands on me right now.”
His mouth thinned. She watched the loss of control happen in his eyes before he flipped her onto her back on the bed and came down on top of her. “I would spank you,” he breathed, pinning her hands above her head, “but that won’t help me figure out what’s going on in your head.”
She fought against his hold, the tears stinging her eyes reaching a critical mass. “Goddamn you, Coburn, let me go. I’m not in the mood for this.”
“Tell me what’s wrong and I will.”
She called him the filthiest word she could come up with. He brought his mouth down on hers and kissed her. A hard, brutal punishment meant to command. She fought him for as long as she had it in her, her knee driving up against him ineffectually, her body twisting beneath his. Then she unraveled.
Sobs rose in her throat. Her hands came up to push against his face. Coburn lifted his mouth from hers and stared down at her. Hot tears slid down her cheeks. She hated herself for it, for this show of weakness. But her defenses were long gone, annihilated by his persistent seduction that had knocked down each and every one of her barriers.
She felt stripped raw, ravaged.
He let go of her hands and cupped her jaw. “Tell me what’s wrong.”
She bit her lip. Tried to resist, but the words slid out of her mouth under his insistent gaze. “I’m scared.”
“About what?”
“About us. About this baby. About what it will do to us...”
He frowned. “What do you mean ‘what it will do to us’? We’re doing just fine.”
“And what happens when you decide you don’t actually want a baby? When the stress of having a child puts more strain on our relationship than it can handle and we crumble?”
“We aren’t going to crumble. And I do want this baby.”
“No.” She shook her head. “You told Arthur you didn’t want to have kids. You’re going to resent me for this someday. Feel trapped.”
His gaze softened. “I admit it took me some time to get my head around this baby. I hadn’t even remotely been in that head space with everything I’ve taken on. And you know my family history hasn’t been the best. But to say I don’t want what you and I made together? Impossible.”
That stole her words. Her breath as she absorbed it. He shook his head. “And as for feeling trapped? Do you think I would have chased you halfway around the world if I didn’t have the feelings I have for you? I could have supported you and this baby without making a commitment to you. I would have if I didn’t think we were right.”
“That’s just it.” She fixed an agonized look on his face. “I don’t know how you feel. You’ve accomplished your mission, Coburn. You’ve stripped me wide-open. Here I am, yours for the taking. Madly in love with you. In fact, I don’t think I’ve ever stopped loving you, not for one minute. I think I went to that party hoping to see you. Hoping you still loved me.”
Something shifted in his face. He was quiet for so long she could hear the sound of her heart pounding in her ears. She wanted to curl up in a ball, like an animal protecting its fleshy underside, but his body still held hers pinned down.
