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She stopped. Her chest was heaving, and suddenly she got to her feet.
‘And then,’ she went on, each word cutting the air, ‘that evening, at that charity ball, you told me you were going back to Athens the next morning.’
She stopped again and swallowed. There was a stone in her throat, and she had to swallow it. Nikos was sitting immobile, looking at her. His face was a mask, and she knew why. She forced herself on, each word like broken glass in her throat.
‘I knew that could only mean one thing. You were finished with me. And that meant you were finished with my father, too. That you weren’t going to be his white knight. And you weren’t going to be my—’
She took another razoring breath. The stone in her throat was still there, but she had to force herself to speak all the same. Why, she didn’t know. Nikos knew the truth. He had known it four years ago. He knew it now.
‘So it was to be our last evening together—ever. And I couldn’t bear it. I couldn’t bear it. So I invited you in, knowing we’d be alone in the house, and I made myself as…as enticing as I could. It…it was like…like a test. Were you really going to finish with me? Were you really going to leave me?’ Her voice dropped. Her hands twisted in her lap, eyes sank.
‘I so, so desperately wanted you to stay.’
Her words came haltingly, each one exacting a price from her in blood.
‘And you did stay.’ She lifted her eyes to him again. Forced herself to look at him. Face him. Confess to him. ‘You stayed. And you made love to me. I knew you would never have done that if you hadn’t been serious about me, about our relationship, because you knew I was a virgin, and I knew you would always respect that. So to me that night was proof that you hadn’t been going to finish with me after all, that you were serious about me and always had been, and that you would sort out everything about the business side of things just as you must have intended all along! We’d get married and live happily ever after, and all Daddy’s worries would be gone because you’d be his son-in-law, and you and your father would be investing in Granton, and Daddy would be happy, and you and I would be happy, and everything in the entire universe was going to be wonderful! Just wonderful! A fairy tale come true, with you as a white knight for my father and for me too!’
Her voice was rank with bitterness, with self-mockery. Self-loathing.
She looked at him. His face was still a motionless mask.
‘And then…’ She swallowed, and the stone was choking her now, suffocating her. ‘Then you told me the truth. About myself. Threw those ugly, brutal home truths at me—showing me just what I’d done.’
Her eyes shut a moment, as if she did not have the strength to keep them open. Then she took another breath and spoke again.
‘And I realised it was true—every word of what you’d said. I realised I’d behaved shamefully, trying to manipulate you, luring you into bed with me. You called me a contemptible little piece of work—and I was. I hated you for it, Nikos, but it was true.’
Her eyes burned in her face. ‘But not this time…’
His face had shuttered, veiled as if by a mask. He sat back, leaning back against the sofa, spreading his arms along the cushions, crossing one leg over another. Elegant, devastating. In the pit of her churning stomach, Sophie felt a clench suddenly.
Get out! Get out while you can! You were mad to let him bring you here! You’ve said your piece—for what the hell it was worth!—now go!
She took a heavy, angry, heaving breath. He looked so damn relaxed, lounging back on the sofa! So damnably devastating! Greedily, hungrily, her eyes devoured him, even though she tried to stop herself. But this would be the very last time she would set eyes on him. In a moment she would be gone out of his life for ever. And never, never again would she see his face in the flesh, see the perfect curve of his cheekbones, the blade of his perfect nose, the sculpted, sensuous mouth that could make her run with hot and cold if she let herself, for a single second, remember the touch of his lips on her flesh, and the eyes, those beautiful, dark, gold-glinting, long-lashed eyes, that she could drown in, down, down, down into their depths, never to surface…
With all the strength she had left, she pulled herself to her feet. A raking breath left her stricken lungs. ‘I’m going now, Nikos. There’s nothing else you need to know.’
She made to turn, to head for the door of the suite, but his words stayed her in her tracks.
‘You’re wrong. There is something I need to know—very badly.’
