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“No. We haven’t talked about hard limits yet and I knew he wouldn’t do that.”
“Let’s talk about that now. Off the top of your head, give me your hardest limits.”
She bit her lip for a second. “I made a list in a document on my computer, in case you wanted it.”
“You don’t need to go to your computer right now. Just tell us your biggest concerns.”
“The really edgy stuff comes to mind first. Piercing, asphyxiation, knife and fire play, scat, golden showers, and really heavy pain play. I don’t have a high pain threshold. Also, anything that has to do with humiliation. No slapping or yelling…” The image of Brent, his face right up in hers, yelling at her until spittle formed in the corners of his mouth came to mind and she shuddered and shook her head.
Travis instantly released her, but stayed near. “Okay, that was a big one, for you, going by how you just reacted. Absolutely no humiliation play is fine with us. What else?”
Maybe it was his reassuring tone, or his protective stance and the serious look in his eyes but she blurted out. “I trust you with everything else if you understand that about me.”
Hank moved about the bed quietly as he asked, “What about being restrained?”
“As long as the restraints don’t cut into my skin and you don’t ever leave me alone while tied up, I actually find that to be a turn-on.”
Travis drew her gaze back to him so she could no longer watch Hank. “We’re definitely exploring that then, Nika. Would you tell me about your anxiety at the wedding, yesterday?”
She nodded. “Crowds. Tight places. I was really nervous yesterday because I knew if I had a panic attack there was no easy exit strategy. That fact heightened my anxiety. If I don’t keep a tight rein on it, it can spiral out of control. I carry a prescription for emergencies but I didn’t have it with me yesterday. I avoid using it unless I’m certain I can’t stall the anxiety in other ways. I dealt with it okay yesterday, and you were…”
“We were what?” Travis asked with a grin.
Veronica smiled. “You were an excellent distraction, although I got nervous for an entirely different reason. Crowds and social events like that are something I tend to avoid.”
Hank said, “Thank you for being honest about it. I’ve had other friends who dealt with panic attacks. If you ever feel one coming on while we’re playing, or anywhere else for that matter, I want you to promise that you’ll tell us, either through your safeword or however you’re able to. I can’t stress how important that is to us. And if you’re ever taking your anxiety meds, we’d need to know that, too, before we play.”
“I promise.”
“That leads us to the next question. What’s your safeword?”
“Marshmallow,” she said with a smile.
Travis’s barking laughter and the sparkle in his eyes as he slipped the sweater from her shoulders made a corresponding happy sensation bubble up inside her. She was afraid to give it a name but liked the way it felt.
Travis said, “She has us nailed, doesn’t she, Hank?”
“Speak for yourself, asshole. She’s going to think she can wrap us around her finger. You should’ve let her discover on her own that we aren’t uber-Doms who want her to kiss our feet.”
The siren in her surfaced and Veronica turned back to gaze at Hank for a second and said, “Who’s to say that I would mind kissing your feet. I might like that. I should show you my list.”
“I’ll make a note, sassy.” Hank growled and she heard a zipper being unzipped behind her. “You’re not naked yet.”
Travis shook his head and drew her attention again. He liked being able to look in her eyes while she talked. “Let’s talk about health for a second. Hank and I both have clean bills of health, with paperwork to prove it. I don’t engage in casual sex and I use a condom every time. I’d love to be a dad but I want it to be a planned event and not a surprise, although I would step up if something happened.”
Hank said, “We’re like-minded in that regard, Nika. When we say we want to take care of you, it extends to all facets of our relationship.”
