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Nora tried to eat, but the silence tore at her nerves. It was hard enough to be estranged from your child when thousands of miles separated you . . . but estrangement at the same table was brutal.
One personal thing.
Leos advice came back to her. It had seemed easy enough when she was on the phone with her doctor; now, sitting beneath this cone of silence, it felt like a herculean undertaking.
She was still trolling for an icebreaker when Ruby said, “Excuse me,” got up from the table, and went across the kitchen. She started filling the sink with water.
Nora hadnt realized that eating was a timed event. Fortunately, she kept this observation to herself. She cleared the table, stacked the dishes on the counter at Rubys elbow. In an unnerving silence, Ruby washed and Nora dried. When they were finished, Nora wheeled herself into the living room.
She mentally prepared for round two.
Ruby swept past her-practically running-and headed for the stairs.
Nora had to think fast. “Why dont you make us a fire? June nights are always chilly. ”
Ruby stumbled to a halt. Without answering, she went to the hearth and knelt down to build a fire.
She did it exactly as shed been taught by Grandpa Bridge.
“I guess some things you never forget,” Nora said.
Ruby sat back on her heels and held her hands out toward the fire. It was a full minute before she turned to Nora and said, “Except how it feels to have a mother. ”
Nora sucked in a sharp breath. “Thats not fair. I was with you every day until . . . ”
“Until the day you werent. ”
Nora clasped her hands together and slid them between her legs. She didnt want Ruby to see how badly she was trembling. “You and Caroline were my whole world. ”
Ruby laughed drily and got to her feet, moving toward Nora. “We werent your whole world the summer I was sixteen; that was the year you walked into the living room, dropped your suitcase on the floor; and announced that you were leaving, wasnt it? And what was it you said to us-”Who wants to come with me?“ Yes, that was it. Who wants to come with me?” As if Caroline and I would set down our forks, clear the table, and move away from our dad and our home just because you decided you didnt want to be here. "
“I didnt decide . . . I left because-”
“I dont care why you left. Thats what you care about. ”
Nora longed to make Ruby understand, even if it was only the merest bit. Just enough so that they could simply talk. “You dont know everything about me. ”
Ruby looked down at her. Nora thought she saw a war going on inside her daughter; as if Ruby wanted both to keep fighting and to stop. It surprised Nora. She understood why her daughter would want to keep distance between them. What she couldnt imagine was why Ruby was still standing here. It was, in truth, a little disconcerting. She got the unsettling feeling that Ruby-honest-to-a-fault Ruby-" hiding something.
“Tell me something about you, then,” Ruby said at last.
This was Noras chance. She knew she needed to tread carefully. “Okay, lets go sit on the porch-like we used to, remember? Well each share one piece of information about ourselves. ”
Ruby laughed. “I asked you to tell me about you. I didnt offer to reciprocate. ”
Nora stood her ground. “I need to know about you, too. Besides, if were both talking, we can pretend its a conversation. ”
Ruby wasnt laughing now. “Very Silence of the Lambs of you, Nora. Quid pro quo. For every secret you tell me, I tell you one. ”
“I suppose Im Hannibal Lecter in your little comparison. A cannibal . . . and a psychopath, how lovely. ”
Ruby studied her a minute longer. "This should be interesting. Im twenty-seven; you were . . . . . when, the day before yesterday? I guess its time we talked. Come on.
She watched her daughter walk through the kitchen and disappear onto the porch. The screen door banged shut behind her. Nora finally allowed herself to smile.
Ruby had remembered her birthday.
Finally, she wheeled out onto the porch, thankful to see that the rain had stopped. Cool night air breezed across her cheeks, carrying with it the smells of a life gone by-the sea, the sand, the roses climbing along the railings. They had bloomed early this year; as they always did after a mild winter. In another two weeks there would be saucer-size blossoms crawling up the trellises and along the picket fence.
