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She makes a face. “What Xander doesn’t know won’t hurt him—and if you even think about telling him I’ll kick you in the balls so hard you’re only going to be able to sing in a falsetto for the rest of your life.”
I can’t help it, I laugh, but I have no doubt she will make good on her promise.
“Here, take the demon spawn.” She thrusts the baby at me and I grab her. She smacks her chubby hand against my cheek and makes some kind of baby gurgling noise.
“Your mommy is crazy, you know that, right?” I ask the baby, and she blinks big brown eyes at me like my words are nothing new to her.
“I’m not crazy, everyone else is and they don’t understand the concept of normal.”
“Whatever you say.” I bounce the baby as Thea makes herself at home, plopping on the couch and picking up a magazine before looking at it with distaste and tossing it down so hard it slides off the table and onto the floor. She makes no move to pick it up. “Why are you here?” I ask.
She rolls her eyes like the answer is obvious and I’m too dumb to get it. “You and Nova have been rolled up in your little love den ever since you got back. We haven’t seen you in forever. I was getting worried.”
I raise and brow and kiss Xael’s cheek. “Worried, or in need of a babysitter?”
She sighs. “A bit of both.”
I laugh and shake my head. At least Thea’s always honest.
“Speaking of Nova, where is she?” Thea asks, looking around like she’s going to find Nova hiding under the damn coffee table.
“Working,” I reply, as Xael wraps her little fist around my finger and squeezes. The kid is freakishly strong, but I shouldn’t be surprised considering she shares DNA with Thea, and I’m one hundred percent sure Thea is not from this planet.
“Anyway, I wanted to tell you guys we’re planning a dinner at our house this Saturday and you’re expected to be there. If you’re not, do not underestimate me. I will hunt you fuckers down, tie you up, and toss you in my trunk and drag you there.”
I snort. “You really think you can lift me?”
She looks me up and down. “Adrenaline is a wonderful thing.”
I can’t help myself. I toss my head back and laugh. Thea is truly one of a kind.
“We’ll be there,” I agree, if only because she’s right. We have been MIA. Nova and I aren’t very social people and it’s easy for us to get caught up in our own little world and forget how much time has passed.
She levels me with a look. “You better be, that’s all I’m saying.”
She picks up the remote and turns the TV on.
I raise a brow at her audacity, but this is Thea we’re talking about. “Staying a while?” I ask.
“Yeah, why not.” She shrugs, flicking through the channels. “I’m hungry, why don’t you make me a sandwich?” She turns to me with a little smirk.
“Sure, dear,” I joke. “Take your baby.”
I hand the baby over to her and then proceed to make her a sandwich with all the grossest things I can think of.
Three-day-old fettuccine alfredo, some of the Chinese food we ordered in last night, pickles, sriracha sauce, a dabble of milk, topped off with macaroni cheese I find in the back of the fridge that I’m pretty sure we made when we first got back from Paris.
I put a piece of bread on top and smile at my masterpiece.
I trade Thea the plate for the baby and not taking her eyes off the TV she lifts the sandwich and takes a bite. She immediately spits it out everywhere, some spraying all the way across the room onto the TV.
She looks at the sandwich frowning in disgust and wiping her tongue with the back of her hand.
“Well played, my friend. Well fucking played.” She thrusts the plate back at me. “Now make me a real sandwich.”
We order pizza instead because I’m fucking hungry too.
Thea makes herself comfy, stretching her legs on the coffee table, Xael now sleeping peacefully in her arms making these cute baby snoring sounds.
