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“What the fuck? Is this pick on Brody day?” Brody asks.
Drew looks around the bar. “I don’t see any other whiny bitches around here.”
“Fuck both of you dickheads,” Brody mutters as he walks over to the bar.
I laugh. “So how long have you known Brody?”
Drew racks the balls on the felt. “We were in the same frat. I was his big brother.” He nods to the table. “You mind if I break?”
I shake my head. “Go for it.”
Brody returns with a pitcher of beer and three glasses. He pours one for himself and takes a seat at a nearby table. “Drew, when’s your fine ass sister getting here?”
Drew makes his shot and scowls. “Shut the fuck up, dude.”
Brody laughs. “Why? I’m only speaking the truth.” He looks at me. “Rye, wait until you meet Drew’s little sister. She and her friend always joins us for Monday Night Football. Fuck, I’d give my left nut to be the meat in that sandwich.”
“Keep it up, asshole,” Drew mutters.
I laugh. “Hot sister, huh?”
Drew points his cue at me. “Don’t even think about it. My sister is off limits.”
I raise my hands in defense. “It’s all good, dude. You don’t need to worry about me.”
Drew narrows his eyes. “Why not? Are you batting for Team Sausage?”
My eyes widen. “What? No!”
Brody laughs. “Nah, man. Riley’s just hung up on the Magic Pussy. Has been for years. This asshole finally nutted up and decided to try winning her back by moving to Seattle.”
Drew pats me on the back. “Ah, the elusive Magic Pussy. Been there, dude. It sucks. So this chick lives in Seattle?”
I take a sip of beer. “No, Portland. Seattle is the closest place I could find a job in my field.”
Drew nods to Brody. “So you’re into airplanes and shit too?”
I laugh. “Yeah, you could say that.”
“That’s cool,” Drew says. “So what’s the story with this lady friend of yours?”
“Aw, man, this is good,” Brody interrupts. “So, apparently, they were good friends in college, but Riley here decided to try the whole friends with benefits thing their last year in school. Things got weird and they lost contact. I watched him date one hot blonde after another in Boston trying to get over her, but the Magic Pussy always prevailed. Apparently, she smells like baked goods or some shit like that. Riley can’t walk into a donut shop without getting a hard-on.”
“Shut up, asshat. That’s not true,” I argue.
Brody laughs. “Right. Why is it that you’re not allowed in that Krispy Kreme again?”
I glare at him while Drew hunches over in laughter. “Fuck you, dude.”
“Speaking of hot blondes,” Brody says. “Seriously, Drew, what time is your sister supposed to show?”
Drew glares at him. “Why do you care?”
Brody shrugs. “Just curious.”
I stare at Brody for a few seconds trying to figure him out. “Are you interested in her or something?”
“He’d better not be,” Drew says. “He knows the rules. She’s off limits.”
