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Did he not understand what his touch was doing to me?
How empty I felt without him inside me?
But I was pretty sure he did know—almost positive he felt the same way. He was breathing just as hard as I was, and his cock had only gotten harder, more angry looking. As he reached behind me to unclasp my bra, I slipped my hand down and stroked my palm over his length before wrapping my fingers around it.
I felt his whole body clench, felt tension return to his muscles. But it was a new kind of tension, one I wanted to wind up until it snapped, so instead of letting go, I squeezed a little harder, pumping my hand up and down.
He let out a choked noise, thrusting his hips hard into my touch.
When I did it again, he grabbed my chin with one hand, his nostrils flaring before he dropped his head to kiss me. His lips devoured me as he reached for the condom wrapper, only breaking away for a second to tear it open with his teeth.
Whatever he’d been trying to do, whatever he thought the right way was, he didn’t have the willpower to hold out any longer. He rolled the condom on with quick movements, and I was already reaching for him, digging my fingernails into his back as he plunged inside me again.
This time, he didn’t hold back.
I missed the feeling of his bare skin against mine as he moved inside me, hated having any barrier between us, but that thought was quickly swept away by the sensations gathering low in my belly, spreading out to fill every part of me.
It was hard and fast and exactly what I needed.
Mason had been teetering on the edge of control already, and through the connection between our bodies, I felt the moment his restraint broke entirely. His thrusts fell out of rhythm, and the bed creaked beneath us as he let out a feral, primal grunt.
The sound and the feel of it pushed me over the edge, and the orgasm that poured through my body felt like liquid fire. I wrapped my arms and legs around him, pinning him to me as I shuddered beneath him. “Fuck. Mason…!”
Aftershocks quaked through us both, and our heavy breaths synchronized as we slowly came down from the high. When he finally withdrew and tugged the condom off, dropping it in the small trash can near the head of the bed, I felt suddenly empty.
Then he flopped back down on the bed beside me, lying on his back and pulling me on top of him so my body draped over his. I rested my palms on his chest and let my chin settle on the back of my hand so I could peer up into his eyes.
He gazed down at me steadily, unblinking, his gaze warm but cautious, as if he wasn’t quite sure what to say.
I wasn’t either.
This wasn’t what I’d expected to happen when I’d brought him back here, and even though it’d felt good, felt necessary somehow, I wasn’t sure it had changed anything between us.
I wasn’t sure it had fixed anything.
“What happened?” I asked softly, certain I still wouldn’t get an answer. “With Preston. What happened? Please, tell me.”
Mason was silent for a long time, still as a statue beneath me. If I hadn’t been able to feel his heart thrumming steadily against mine, I might’ve thought he was one.
Then, finally, he shook his head.
“You were right. I don’t know. I still don’t know if he or Adena touched your car. I don’t know if it was them. And I fucking hate that.” His arms tightened around me, wrapping me up in something almost like a bear hug. “It was fucking stupid. I’ve known Preston was a jackass since our freshman year, and now that he’s following Adena everywhere, I know he’s a little bitch too.”
I shifted against him, and he loosened his hold just a little to let me move.
“I shouldn’t have let him bait me, I fucking know that. But he told me… he told me I’d never be able to protect you. That I can’t keep you safe.” His jaw clenched, his lips pressing together angrily. “Maybe he wasn’t talking about the car. I don’t know. But that’s all I could think about. You, trapped in that hunk of metal, spinning out, rolling off the road.” When his arms tightened again, it was almost hard to breathe. “And he was right. I didn’t protect you then. I couldn’t.”
Mason’s features twisted in anger, and I knew that although some of it might be directed at Preston, more of it was directed at himself.
I shook my head, the movement small. “It doesn’t mean you didn’t want to, or that you didn’t try. There’s no way to keep everyone you care about safe all the time, no matter how hard you try. You can’t be everywhere at once, and you can’t prevent what you don’t see coming.”
“I should’ve seen it coming though. I should’ve fucking seen it.” The consuming pain was back in his eyes, and I knew his guilt would make it impossible for him to hear what I was saying, to believe any of it. To ever stop blaming himself.
He glanced down at my face, finally releasing his tight grip on me to run a knuckle over the line of my cheekbone. He pursed his lips, his eyes going a bit glassy. Then he murmured, “She was so sad. I should’ve seen it coming.”
My heart lurched to a stop as a sick feeling twisted in my gut.
He was talking about his mom.
