Page 105 of Malachi and I


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She pulled back and eyed me up and down. “Well look at you, you’re a real townie.”

“I’m just good with names—”

“HELP!”

Both our heads turned in time to see that the ice had cracked right under the kids’ feet.

“DON’T MOVE!” Murphy ran and so did I. We reached the edge of the pond when all of sudden the ice gave way and their piercing screams were short, quick, and petrified as they sank beneath the ice.

Murphy moved to run in but froze as her hands moved to her stomach.

DON’T! My mind screamed and I thought it was to her but I realized I was already running forward and diving through the ice. The water cut me like knives, stabbing me on all sides, then darkness covered everything. I grabbed one of their hands and lifted her up above the water, Murphy grabbed hold of her and pulled her out as I went down again to get the others. One by one I pushed them up out of the water, each time my body slowing down as I did.

MALACHI

By the time we made back to the beach, everyone was running towards the pond and I didn’t know why until I saw her, just the top of her curly brown hair, diving into ice.

“ESTHER!” The scream broke through my lips like fire and my heart burned as I dropped everything in my hands and ran not towards the beach but towards the ice. I knew they were yelling for me to stop but I couldn’t. Everything was pulling me towards the crater-sized hole right by the water’s edge.

“I can’t see her!” Someone hollered coming up for air. “Don’t—”

I didn’t wait as I jumped in after her. The water…it was death. If anything could embody anything else, this water was death; cold, punishing and void of almost all light. I could barely see the fading sunlight and my lungs burned the longer I stayed under, but I didn’t care. I swam further in, my head snapping left and right. I prayed in that moment that whatever it was that connected us—love, magic, God, whatever it was— it would help me get to her. When I saw the bubbles float up I dove down, only to see her screaming. I grabbed her and she stared at me in terror as she grabbed her throat and then she went still.

ESTHER!

I couldn’t scream. All I could do was reach out and grab her as I swam back towards the break in the ice. My vision tunneled and still I lifted her up first until finally we both broke the surface and I gasped for air before screeching out her name. “Esther! ESTHER!”

I couldn’t focus on anyone else, even as they helped us out and laid her on the snow. They were yelling, trying to cover me, trying to pull us part. I put my arms and thumped down on her chest harder than I probably should have before I bent over and blew the air that was barely filling my lungs into hers.

“Come on!” I yelled at her before breathing into her mouth once more. “ESTHER, COME ON!”

It felt like far too many seconds had gone by before she coughed up the water.

“That’s it. Come on, baby!” I tilted her head to the side allowing the water to drain out but she started to tremble in my arms. “Esther?”

Her brown eyes snapped open and I saw the terror in them.

“No, no, you’re fine.”

“I’m…I…I’m… sorry,” she gasped as her teeth chattered. I glanced up, looking for anything to warm her up and I noticed that several people were busy wrapping the boys in foil blankets. There were dozens of people around us who were rushing to help and yet I felt nothing but terror.

“I,” she fought to say. “I didn’t…know…I ….I…was…just…jumping…in…I’m so…”

“Baby, it’s okay. Shh…it’s okay, you’re okay,” I said as I rocked her. I heard them call for the ambulance and I tried to rise but my legs were numb.

“Sor…I’m…Sorry...s…”

“ESTHER! ESTHER!” I shook her but she went limp in my arms. I couldn’t feel her pulse. “No, no, no, no, no. Esther? ESTHER! SHE NEEDS HELP! PLEASE HELP!

Not like this. I couldn’t lose her like this. No.

Why did this always happen?

Why…we’d just…why?

God, why?

24. THE SECRET TO LIVING

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