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He leaned forward and took my hands. “I’m sorry. I’m just excited is all.”
“I am, too, and still a bit shocked. Things between us felt like they were ending only a few days ago and now we’re…engaged.”
He nodded. “It was just stressful with the end of school, I get that. I’ve been busy and not giving you the attention you needed.”
If only I had believed that were the reason. Maybe we truly were growing apart. Or maybe I was letting those old feelings resurface now that I was heading home. What would I find when I got back to Oak Springs?
Rip. And he would probably be dating someone.
I closed my eyes. It’s time to move on, Chloe.
“Let’s finish up and then go back to your place. Has Alyssa already left for Oak Springs?”
Picking my fork back up, I nodded. “Yes. She and Mike left earlier today.”
“Perfect. It will be me and you alone for the evening.”
“I only have a blow-up mattress left at the apartment.”
He winked. “That’s all we need to celebrate.”
I waited for the warm feeling in my belly to consume me like it used to when we first started dating. But nothing came. And that filled me with something I couldn’t put a name to—anxiety or maybe dread. I think I was too stubborn to admit what I truly felt. But excited wasn’t it.
Rip
DIGGING THE HOOKS into the hay bale, I picked it up and tossed it onto the back of the trailer. The faster I moved, the more my mind stayed busy.
“Rip, this isn’t a contest. Slow the hell down before you hurt yourself,” Trevor called out.
When I wasn’t working for my brother Jonathon, I was helping Trevor, Mitch, and Steed out on the ranch. Knowing Chloe was fixin’ to be home any day had my stomach in knots. The last four years had been a living hell for me. Chloe tried to act like that fight never happened, but I relived it every damn day since she walked out the door. Regret was my new best friend, seated alongside whiskey.
My heart slammed against my chest as I fought the urge to tell her how much I loved her. My mind wouldn’t let my heart win.
Her face looked defeated as she said, “I see. So you’re not in love with me enough to be with me, but love me enough to keep me by your side all the time. Then why did you keep me so close all through high school?”
“Chloe.”
“No, Rip, there were so many times I looked into your eyes and it felt like I was looking into my own soul. I thought you wanted to be with me.”
Fuck, if she only knew how much I wanted to be with her. Make her mine. Take her to my room and spend the next week in there with her, learning what she liked, learning the sounds she made when we kissed, when we touched, when we made love.
Then she laughed. It wasn’t her normal, sweet, warm-my-insides laugh. It was cold and meaningless.
I looked at her, willing myself to tell her the truth.
Chloe turned from me and tossed her hands into the air out of frustration.
“I can’t believe this. I had it all wrong.”
“Chloe, no, you didn’t have it wrong. It’s just…”
She spun around and shot me a glare. Anger filled her eyes and there wasn’t a damn thing I could do to take it away. I knew I was ripping her heart out.
“You want me all to yourself, and no other man can have me. Not even you. Is that it, Rip?”
Guilty, I glanced at the floor.
“I’m going to ask you once more, and if your answer is still no, I will never bring this up again.”
My eyes met hers. “Chloe, don’t do this to me. You sprung this shit on me our first fucking day in College Station.”
“Do you want something more than friendship, Rip?”
Yes! Fuck yes! I’m scared shitless! Give me a minute to process this!
My silence was her answer. She made her way over to the sofa, grabbed her things and headed to the door.
“Chloe. Chloe!”
Alyssa stopped me before she walked out the door. “I thought I knew you, Rip Myers.”
The door shut, and I nearly let my legs buckle.
“Do have any idea what in the hell you just did, Rip?”
I didn’t even bother trying to hide the tears that slipped free.
“I just let the most amazing thing in my life walk away from me.”
“Rip, go after her. Take a chance, damn it. If it doesn’t work out, you won’t lose her as a friend.”
My feet stayed planted in the same spot until Mike shouted my name.
“Rip! Go!”
Moving as fast as I could, I ran out the door and tried to flag Alyssa down, but they were driving off.
I was too late.
Leaning over, I dragged in a few breaths, and each one burned like hell. When I finally managed to walk back into the house, I caught Mike’s eyes.
