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“I think you have a new challenge in your hands,” Melanie tells me over the phone. I scroll through the entries on my laptop, looking for any new problems that I might've missed.
“Oh really?” I reply. “I think it's handled, actually. Taylor Swift dropped that new song just in time, and everybody's attention mo
ved away.”
“Lucky for you, wasn't it?” Melanie says wryly.
She's right, it was lucky for me, but I'm not going to admit that. Somehow, I’m going to make it seem like it was all part of my plan.
“Everything seems to have a way of working out, Melanie. So, we just have a few more days with Kirkman here in town. Can we just try to lay low and get to the end of this thing? Maybe without going nuclear?”
I hear her tapping, maybe on the edge of her desk, maybe on her steering wheel. Melanie is always going somewhere, doing something.
Kirkman is actually not her only client, so I never really feel like he's got one hundred percent of her attention. I suspect that she plays the celebrities off each other, creating collisions like billiard balls so somebody's always in motion, always spinning toward the edge.
She sighs for a long time. I use this pause to double and triple check my lists. But currently, there’s nothing important to take care of. Crisis averted.
Kirkman really did look like he was going to be trending, and then Taylor Swift knocked him right out of the air. Suddenly everybody was downloading her video, posting their comments, and sharing the reactions of a half dozen other stars who wanted to hitch their wagons to Taylor's meteoric rise.
In less than twenty-four hours, her new song was the most downloaded song on iTunes. It was the most played video on YouTube. She has a lot of influence. I'll bet Kirkman's seriously jealous, but the plain fact is that he doesn’t have nearly that kind of firepower.
“Well, that's the thing I wanted to talk to you about,” she continues. “He's got a weekend at MGM National Harbor coming up now. You need to get him out of town.”
“MGM, in Maryland? Are you kidding me?”
“Why the fuck would I joke about Maryland? It’s our least funny state.”
“When did this come up? I was not informed.”
“It’s all Kirkman’s idea. Talk to him. He thought a surprise show was a good idea and I can’t say I disagree.”
I don't need to remind her that my contract was for this location, creating a security detail around this studio, these penthouses, this situation. She knows. She also knows that I don't have time to plan a new detail for the weekend. It's going to be all seat of the pants kind of stuff.
My least favorite kind of stuff.
“Melanie, this is highly unusual,” I start, grinding my molars together to try to keep my voice even. “I need to make travel arrangements, get a whole new manifest of entourage personnel approved, reconnoiter the lodging —”
“— sounds like you got it exactly right,” she snaps. “Just make it happen, August. At the end of this, he'll be totally out of your hair anyway.”
Well, that is a relief, I think to myself. At least there is a silver lining on this thundercloud.
“It's practically impossible,” I inform her.
She sighs again, dragging it out so long it's practically an opera.
“You know Lori Coleman?”
“Of course I know Lori Coleman,” I reply, suspicious. “Why would you ask me that?”
“Oh, I had an interesting conversation with her this morning, is all,” she sighs. “Are you guys friends?”
I don't think that I appreciate the playful tone in Melanie's voice. I feel like I know exactly what she's going to say, but I still want to hear her say it, just to make sure.
“We're competitors, Melanie. I assume you already know that.”
“Oh, hold on,” she snaps distractedly. “Let me just get through this tunnel.”
The line seems to go down for a second, but I'm not sure that's true. She may just have switched over to another phone call. Or she might just be fucking with me. At this point, it's hard to tell. In any case, this brief silence gives me an opportunity to get truly pissed about what Melanie is insinuating.
