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Jayson’s hands move over my body with blatant possessiveness, but for once it doesn’t bother me. His touch is intoxicating, and his kisses drug me. For the first time ever, I feel true desire. I want him to hold my naked body against his and to grasp his hipbones as I guide him inside me, to squeeze him as he thrusts in and out, to wrap my legs around him and clutch his back as he fucks me.
There are so many sensations swirling around me that it’s difficult to separate the sources until Jayson moves his hand up my thigh, under the hem of my dress. I freeze, eyes wide open, as he hesitates, fingers hovering over the scrap of silk and lace that is the only barrier to my wet opening. He lifts his mouth from mine, and our gazes lock. “Harper?”
The rational part of me screams at me to push his hand away and leave the room before our interlude leads us to a decision that can’t be undone. The other, more primitive part of me yearns to feel his fingers against me, in me. I bow my head, pressing my forehead against his shoulder, letting him decide.
I bite my lower lip when he strokes me through the panties, simultaneously wanting him to stop and wanting to push the material aside. As though he’s reading my thoughts, Jayson slips a finger under the fabric, touching my soft, wet heat. I cry out, lying back as he guides me, his fingers moving restlessly between my swollen, tender folds.
Closing my eyes, I clench my hands into fists to keep from crying out more, afraid I won’t be able to control the volume of my voice and we’ll be discovered. His touch makes me wild, clutching him, pushing against his hand. I’ve never imagined such feelings. With tender expertise, Jayson brings me to the edge. Arching against his hand, I’m unable to keep back a groan as he sends me over. He leans into me, sealing my mouth with his to muffle my cries.
My body convulsing, I whimper as the pleasure ebbs. I have no words to express myself, so I stroke my fingers through his hair as he kisses me, hungrily.
We freeze at the sound of voices passing by the corridor. I blink and then pull away from him so quickly I almost roll off the table. Jayson catches me, easing us both into an upright position. “The voices of reason,” he says with a grin. I nod, still incapable of speech. “It’s for the best,” he says as he straightens my shirt and then refastens his buttons.
“Yes,” I manage to rasp. It’s definitely for the best that things stopped there.
“I don’t want to make love to you for the first time on a hard table, anyway.”
I drag in a deep breath as he opens the door.
“We should be back at the harbor soon,” says Jayson after a glance at his watch. “I better return you or risk attacking you right here.”
I give him a shaky smile. “Yes.” When he puts his arm around my waist, drawing me close, I don’t fight. Sanity may be returning, and I know I can’t go to bed with Jayson, but I can’t talk about it yet. As we rejoin the party, I almost turn to him, but can’t. It makes sense to tell him I haven’t changed my mind about sex, despite what had just occurred, but it just feels too soothing to have his arm around me to say anything right now. Feeling cowardly, I snuggle against him, allowing myself the delight and release of a few more minutes in his arms.
Jayson
The cruise ends within the hour, and we return to the harbor. The limousine awaits, and Harper slips inside, then I do. She licks her lips, looking like she wants to say something. I don’t want to hear it.
Pushing the windblown hair off her neck to nibble on her skin, she succumbs at first, then pulls away. I follow.
“Jayson, stop,” she says.
I lift my head. “I’m sorry to paw at you like a horny teenager,” I say with a grin. “I suppose I can wait a few more minutes until we’re home.”
Harper scoots over slightly, putting some distance between us. “I’m sorry.”
“Why?” I ask, frowning.
“I’ve given you the wrong idea.” She shakes her head. “I shouldn’t have let things go so far.”
I knew I didn’t want to hear what she has to say. “Do you regret what happened?”
She looks to the side, finally shaking her head. “No. I should, but I don’t.” With a deep breath, she adds, “But that doesn’t matter. It can’t happen again.”
A few Greek curses escape under my breath. “Why not, Harper? Who would it hurt? You’re my wife. It is perfectly normal to make love to you.”
She swallows. “There is no normal for us, Jayson. Everything we have, everything we are, is an illusion.”
“No.” What is she talking about?
“Yes,” she insists. “We’re married, but only for a few more months. We both know getting physical will only complicate things.”
I grasp her hand, pressing it high against my thigh. “How much I want you isn’t an illusion.”
She tugs free of my hold. Harper meets my eyes, admitting to both of us what she’s been denying for so long. “I want you too, Jayson, but I’m not going to give in to that urge. I have to think of the long-term consequences. As much as I want you, I can’t let it happen.”
With a long sigh, I rake a hand through my hair. “I know I could change your mind. And you know it too.”
Harper nods. “You probably could, but it wouldn’t change anything. You know I’m right.”
