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Millions of women brought up children in far less favourable circumstances—with no proper training to get a job and with no one to help out in emergencies. Gladys had been a wonderful neighbour to Liz, and Chloe knew she could count on her if she had no choice.
But should she be so quick to abandon her marriage to Lorenzo?
The flash of joy that had lightened her soul when he appeared at the churchyard the previous day had told her that her feelings still ran deep. And being held in his arms earlier had felt so right.
Now that her emotions were no longer running wild, and she had taken a moment to calm down, she knew for certain that she still loved him. Love wasn’t something she could just switch on or off. It was an unfathomable, undeniable truth that filled her body and soul.
Before Liz died, Chloe had made her a promise—that she wouldn’t hide herself away from life and lock up her heart because she had been hurt. But she didn’t know how that promise fitted into the future Lorenzo was offering.
Should she turn her back on him and give up on the one thing she had truly wanted—marriage and a family with the man she loved? Or should she accept his offer of a secure and privileged life for herself and their children—and give up on her heart’s deepest wish to experience a genuine loving relationship?
It was an impossible choice.
Lorenzo stood by the glass wall of his study and watched Chloe walking along the far edge of the pond, beside a drift of purple irises. Her head was bowed and, although her blonde hair had fallen forward to obscure her face, he knew she was deep in thought. After all, he had given her a lot to think about.
She looked tiny in her jeans and T-shirt, but Lorenzo was getting used to seeing her that way, which was nothing like the way she’d dressed when they were together. When she was his PA she had always dressed smartly for work, and, although her style had been less formal once they were personally involved, she’d always looked well-groomed.
Now the difference in her appearance seemed to underline the difference in their relationship. She looked small and fragile as she sat down on a bench, and as she lifted her head to shake her hair back from her face Lorenzo could see that she was frowning.
Her gaze drifted across the pond, then settled on the huge windows of Lorenzo’s study. She was looking right at him, although he knew she couldn’t see him because the glass had been treated to protect the privacy of his study. He stared back at her, feeling an unexpected jolt of irritation.
Life had been so good, with all his plans for the future falling into place nicely. Why had she gone and complicated everything? He lifted his hand abruptly and, without fully registering his intention, he hit the control that opened the large sliding doors.
Chloe was lost in her thoughts as she gazed across the pond. The sudden movement as the glass door slid silently open brought her back to her surroundings with a start. Then the sight of Lorenzo stepping purposefully onto the deck made her catch her breath in surprise.
She stared at him in shock, slowly realising that she’d foolishly sat down in view of his study. She wasn’t ready to talk to him yet. She was nowhere near ready to decide what to do about his proposition.
He moved swiftly along the deck, then without breaking his stride he turned onto the gravel path that tracked the edge of the pond. He was bearing down on her so quickly that she felt her heart start to race.
She sprang up, ready to face him, although she was filled with the overwhelming urge to bolt. How had things got so difficult between them that the sight of him approaching made her want to run and hide?
She squared her shoulders and stood as tall as she could. She was not afraid of Lorenzo. And she would not shy away from the situation he had put her in.
‘If you’ve come to pressure me for an answer, you’re wasting your time,’ she said. Her voice was clear and steady, and did not reveal how uncertain she was feeling. ‘I have not reached a decision yet.’
Lorenzo came to a halt a few feet away from her—close enough for her to be reminded once again of his sheer size compared to her. But not so close that she had to crane her neck back to meet his eyes. He had discarded his jacket but he was still wearing the same white shirt as that morning.
Her eyes settled on the clusters of creases where she had balled her hands in the fabric of his shirt while she wept, and a disconcertingly vivid memory of lying with her face against his chest flashed through her mind.
‘You are struggling to decide what is best for your future,’ Lorenzo said, ‘and I want you to understand why I believe this is the best arrangement—for everyone.’
‘You already told me your reasons,’ she said quietly. ‘Now it’s up to me to think this through. It’s an important decision I need to work out for myself—decide for myself.’
‘I understand that,’ Lorenzo said, ‘but committing to this marriage, and to raising a family with me, is a huge undertaking. I want you to make this choice with your head, not with your heart.’
Chloe frowned, trying to make sense of what Lorenzo was saying.
‘But marriage is something you feel in your heart,’ she said, unsettled by Lorenzo’s sudden change of tack. Why was he trying to persuade her into this, rather than continue trying to tell her what was the right thing to do? ‘When you proposed to me in Paris, I was so happy. And I truly believed you felt the same way I did.’
‘I was happy,’ Lorenzo replied. ‘I thought that I had found the perfect woman to share my life with—the perfect, uncomplicated partnership based on friendship and compatibility. Not on an over-hyped emotional ideal that would inevitably disintegrate over time.’
‘Not all marriages fail,’ Chloe said, suddenly feeling defensive and sad at the same time. ‘You shouldn’t be so pessimistic—it’s depressing.’
‘Not pessimistic—realistic,’ Lorenzo said. ‘In my experience most marriages do fall apart, and it usually gets pretty ugly. Then the children are the ones who suffer the most.’
Lorenzo looked down at her, reading the emotion written in her expression. She was normally such a positive-thinking, forward-looking person—which was one of the attributes that had drawn him to her in the first place. It was disturbing to see her look unhappy.
‘It doesn’t have to be that way,’ she said. ‘Happy marriages and functional families do exist.’
