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I tried moving again, but it was useless. A shot of adrenaline spiked through me, and panic wracked my insides. I breathed through it, determined to keep my shit together.
This feeling of being powerless and unable to move was far too familiar. It reminded me of the times my Sire had strapped me to a bed whenever the bloodlust became overwhelming, because the asshole hadn’t wanted to help me through it. I’d been left there for hours at a time—trapped, alone, frightened. And damn the bitch for bringing it all back.
Being naked only made me feel that much more vulnerable. Something I loathed feeling. I despised her for that alone.
I tried telepathically reaching out to Jared, but I couldn’t seem to touch his mind. Sam’s shield. It must be acting as a psychic barrier—which made sense, given it would have to protect against mind-to-mind attacks. Shit.
I took another calming breath. Someone would surely search for me soon, right? Probably not until everything had calmed down outside, but they’d eventually come looking. Someone would surely track me to this apartment. Hopefully not too late to help.
Beatrix looked at Coop, whose eyes glimmered with fear. “It’s okay, he’ll be here soon. He’ll be determined to check on you.”
Who? Derek? Was this some sort of trap?
Her gaze slid back to me. “I can see the questions in your eyes, Maya. So much confusion. I do hope you didn’t rush on up here to check on Coop because you care for him or anything. He’s all about Arlo. Did you not know?” She lifted her hand in my direction and sharply twisted it. “Well, did you?”
Realising she genuinely expected an answer, I experimentally tried flexing my jaw. It worked. Apparently she’d unfrozen the muscles necessary for me to speak. “I know he slept with Arlo, yes,” I replied.
“But you came anyway. See, women are the better gender. We’re caring. Compassionate. Loyal. We’re not cold and cruel.”
I wasn’t so sure she could truly claim that about herself. “You called the animals here.”
Her mouth curved into a fond smile. “Aren’t they wonderful?”
Uh, no. “They’re rabid. Why would you do that to them?”
Her brows snapped together. “Not rabid, though that word did come to mind the first time the gift manifested. I hadn’t expected to develop a second ability when I had another vampire boost my power level. I’d thought it would merely strengthen the ability I already had. I’d wanted to be able to take on my Sire, you see—he was a very bad man. Confined me to his dungeon often. That was when I used my second gift for the first time. By accident, of course. There were rats there. I was horrified by what I’d done to the one that bit me, so I didn’t tell my Sire about my ability—he would have had me misuse it.”
“You don’t think you have been misusing it lately?”
“No. I wanted to build my own nest.”
“Why? Why all of a sudden utilise an ability you’ve kept secret for so long?”
An element of vulnerability seeped into her expression. “Animals have always comforted me. They’re so much better than people. They don’t abandon you. They don’t betray you. They don’t hurt you. They don’t suddenly announce that they’re in love with someone else and will win them back by any means.” She shot Coop a sour look. “I would have spared Coop, though. It’s not his fault Derek loved him.”
Loved, not loves, I noted. Shit, the bitch had likely killed him.
“But Arlo needs to suffer,” she said with a grimace, as if speaking his name left a bad taste in her mouth.
“What do you have against Arlo?”
“Did you know that he and Derek used to share a bed? Derek and I had been together for almost a century when he left me for Arlo. They both sat me down and explained that Derek would always be my ‘friend’ but could no longer be my lover; that sometimes people drifted apart. It was all very condescending. Like I was clueless and naïve enough to believe they cared what was ‘best’ for me. Oh yes, they said it would be best if I wasn’t tied to someone I was no longer so close to.
“They didn’t last long as a couple. Derek came back to me. He always did after his little follies. I used to think of those flings as sort of like masturbating. He was just exploring fantasies that would never lead to anything.” Her face hardened. “But then he stopped coming back to me, because Arlo kept interfering, whispering in his ear that it was unfair to me.”
It was possible that Arlo had meant well, but I didn’t say that.
“He convinced Derek to just be my friend.” Her voice cracked.
I could understand her pain, because I couldn’t possibly be only a friend to Ryder—it would be too hard, would hurt too much that he didn’t want more. I hadn’t known him long whereas she’d known Derek for centuries, so her pain would be so much more acute than what mine could possibly be. “You couldn’t let Derek go, could you?”
