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“Well, no. But I wouldn’t have dated someone else while being Damien’s vessel anyway.” Hell, I couldn’t even see other men. It was like he’d swallowed up all my mental space. He was all I saw. All I wanted. All I couldn’t permanently keep.
She tensed at my words. “Please don’t tell me that you two are also still sleeping together.”
Once more, I found myself fighting the need to squirm. “Well …”
She groaned again. “Lexi.”
“I don’t know why you’re making a big deal out of this.” Lie. “Plenty of humans agree to be vessels.”
“It would be no biggie if you didn’t care about Damien—no, don’t even deny that you do, Lexi, I see it in the way you look at him.”
My pulse jumped. That didn’t sound good. “How do I look at him?”
“Like he’s yours,” she said softly. “Having a fling with him wouldn’t necessarily be a big deal if you weren’t attached to him. But he means something to you.”
Well it seemed that my feelings weren’t so secret after all, dammit. I just hoped he hadn’t sensed the truth for himself. No, he’d have backed right off if he had.
Sighing, I slumped in my seat. “I don’t want to care about him.” But how could I not? He was just so … so Damien. It wasn’t about his individual qualities at all, it was about him as a person—the entire package. He was everything I’d want in a guy. Everything I’d never before had.
For me, trust was more important than love. I didn’t find it easy to trust people, though. I wasn’t sure I ever really had. And I didn’t particularly like taking chances on people, because it rarely paid off in my experience. But Damien … I trusted him completely.
He was nothing like the assholes my mom used to date—deadbeats who thought ‘strength’ meant slapping around people who were weaker than them. He was nothing like any of my own exes, who’d had no real staying power and always put themselves first. Damien would never touch a woman in anger, never be cruel to a person he was supposed to care for, never neglect the people who mattered to him, never be anything but reliable and loyal and caring.
Her face softening, Maisy leaned forward and braced her elbows on the table. “If it makes you feel better, I think he has feelings for you, too. That’s why I’m not feeling good about your agreeing to be his vessel rather than keeping distance between you and him. Essentially, you’re playing with fire. But I think you know that.” She shrugged. “I don’t see a happy ending for you two unless you’re prepared to Turn, sweetie. If it’s something you would consider, fine. But don’t repeat my mistake. Don’t Turn for him. It’s got to be something you’d want for you.”
She was right. Unless I knew I could happily live as a vampire alone, I couldn’t make that leap for someone else. I had to do this for me, or not at all.
I bit my lip. “Do you regret Turning?”
“These days? Not so much. Because I recently made the official decision to make the most of my new situation rather than whine about it. But I want to stay angry at Compton, and it’s hard to do that when I have times where I think I could be happy.”
“You can still be mad at him even while you’re happy. You don’t owe him for any happiness you feel. In fact, to move on and still find contentment despite what he did … that’s probably the best form of revenge, isn’t it?”
Her brows inched up. “I guess so. He doesn’t like that I’m officially dating, Harvey. It’s not jealousy. It’s as if Compton just can’t deal with one of his exes being with someone who’s so much better than him.”
“Harvey is so much better than him. More, he’s way cuter.”
She grinned. “That I can wholeheartedly agree—” Her eyes went wide. “Lexi!”
I’d barely had the chance to register that someone was behind me when an arm hooked itself around my neck … and then my surroundings changed in a flash.
(Damien)
No other trails have been discovered around The Hollow, Jared told me, but Sebastian hasn’t found any sign of Castor either. He hasn’t yet searched all the nearest islands, though.
Leaning against the bar while I waited for Lexi to finish her break, I tapped my fingers on the scarred wooden surface. Is it possible that Castor simply just drowned while trying to swim to safety? I asked Jared. It’s not like we’d spot his ashes, is it?
There was a beat of silence. Maybe. But Sam will be disappointed if that’s the case, because she’s looking forward to maiming his ass.
Think she’ll let me watch?
A snicker. Probably, if you ask nicely and promise not to interfere. How’s Lexi?
