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“Yes,” he grunts, but I can tell he’s distracted. His hungry eyes follow every move my hand holding the powder is making.
I shake my head. The disappointment hits me hard, negating the experience we’ve just been through together.
“Am I ever going to be enough, Heath?”
My question surprises us both, and he narrows his eyes at me. “Of course you’re fucking enough, Sunshine.”
“Except I’m not, am I?” I sound bitter as fuck and I’m done fighting it, because it’s how I feel. “I’m not enough to stop you taking the drugs.”
“They make me feel so much, Rain. It’s not about you.”
“Yeah, it’s not. If it were, you’d quit for me, if you can’t see how much it’s hurting you. You’d do it for me. Because I know you’re going to die if you don’t stop.”
“Rain, stop with this nonsense,” he chuckles nervously, reaching out for me. “Just give me the bag and let’s go to sleep.”
“Right,” I mutter miserably. “Right after you take another hit, right?”
He doesn’t answer, which tells me that’s exactly what he was thinking.
“Forget it,” I mutter, running off into the bathroom and flushing the baggie down the toilet just as Heath bursts through the door. “Tomorrow I’m telling Liberato to take all the other stuff, too.”
“You can’t do that,” Heath hisses.
“Fucking watch me. I’m doing it for you. Because I want you with me for a long time. Not to find you dead one morning after you overdose.”
“I will not do that,” he mutters, but it doesn’t sound convincing at all to me.
I shake my head and pick myself up. “I’m going to bed. You coming with me?”
He doesn’t answer, staring down the drain I just flushed like a sullen child.
“Fine,” I hiss, pushing past him and into the hallway. “Have it your way, Heath. One day you’ll realize I was only trying to protect you.”
Something tells me it’s going to take a long time for him to understand that. He doesn’t follow me into the bedroom.
By the time I feel his body slide into the bed next to mine, I’ve calmed down a little. I allow him to wrap his arms around me and breathe in his scent. I tell myself this was just a slip-up, and tomorrow, everything will go back to normal. The way we agreed.
We fall asleep together for the first time since I returned, and I allow myself to relax. Maybe, just maybe, we can make it through this.
Chapter nine
Chapter 15
HEATH
It’s been two weeks since the promise I made to Rain, and since then, I’ve broken it every single day.
I hope she doesn’t know, though I can’t know for sure. But surely she’d realize I’d be having withdrawals now if I really had gone cold turkey. Instead, neither of us mentions what we agreed upon. Meanwhile, my need for her builds.
We haven’t fucked since that time in my study, and I’m growing very fucking impatient. But she hasn’t made a move and I haven’t tried, either, too worried she’d realize I’d gone back on my word already.
I even allow her to continue taking shooting lessons with Liberato. He says he’ll teach her some Spanish, too, and after she begs me for a few days for permission, I finally cave in. It’s shameful to admit I’m doing it more for myself, because it gives me a window of time when I can get as high as I fucking want and nobody gets to judge.
But then one day Rain disappears for her lessons with Liberato, and just as I’ve plunged a needle into my vein in the bedroom, she appears in the door frame.
“Looks like he left to run an errand, the guards said-”
She comes to a grinding stop, eyes widening when she sees what I’ve done. I pull the needle out and toss it before glaring at her with my already darkened gaze.
“You... You broke the promise,” she whispers, as if she can’t believe it.
I smirk, picking myself up from the bed. Adrenaline pumps through my veins as I reach behind her, caging her body beneath mine and closing the door. I click the lock closed and nuzzle her neck.
She tries to push me away, but I instantly grab her wrists and force her arms behind her back. She’s helpless against me, and I can practically smell the scent of her fear in the air. Her hips buck against me, but I don’t comment on it. Her arousal wakes up my cock, and it jerks against the fabric of my pants, ready to plunge inside her again.
“Too fucking bad you had to find out this way,” I tell Rain. “Now I’m going to have to make you forgive me the only way I know how.”
I slip the key to the room into my pocket, watching her swallow with anticipation. I know she’s scared, but I’m also fully aware of her excitement. She wants this. She wants to be a goddamn victim, and I’m throbbing at the thought of turning her into one.
