Page 37 of Artemis


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“I caught you once before.”

“That was ten years ago.”

He pointed to his eyes and then to me. “Watching you.”

“Let me ask you something,” I said. “Who moves all the way to the moon just to mow lawns?”

“I like plants. And my joints hurt. The gravity here’s easy on my arthritis.” He looked up at Earth. “Once the wife died, I didn’t have much reason to stay there.”

“Hell of a trip for an old man,” I said.

“I used to travel a lot for work,” he said. “I don’t mind.”

Svoboda showed up exactly on time, as usual. He carried a bag over his shoulder and smiled. He pointed to me and the goddess statues. “Hey, look at that! Three hot moon babes hanging out!”

I rolled my eyes. “Svoboda, someday I’ll teach you how to talk to women.”

He waved to the groundskeeper. “Hey, I know you. You’re Mike, right?”

“Nope,” said the groundskeeper. He shot me a look. “I’ll leave you and your john alone. No sex on the grass.”

“Try not to age to death on the way home, gramps,” I said.

He waved over his shoulder as he walked away.

“Did you finish it?” I asked Svoboda.

“Yup, got it right here!” He handed the bag over to me.

I peeked inside. “Thanks.”

“Did you get a chance to test that condom yet?”

“It’s been twenty-four hours. What kind of sex life do you think I have?”

“Whatever, I don’t know. Just asking.” He scanned the park. “I don’t come here often enough. It’s a nice place to relax.”

“If you like flying debris, yeah.” The park was infamous for this. If you’re from Earth, no matter how much you mentally prepare yourself, you always throw too hard. Your friend ten meters away—the intended receiver—will watch a ball sail over their head to the other side of the park. And don’t get me started on Frisbees. Between the low gravity and low air pressure they’re a complete mystery to tourists.

“I like it,” Svoboda said. “It’s the only ‘natural’ place in town. I miss open spaces.”

“Plenty of open space outside to look at,?

? I said. “And you can hang out with friends in a bar more easily than a park.”

His face lit up. “We’re friends?”

“Sure.”

“Cool! I don’t have many of those. You’re my only friend with boobs.”

“You really need to work on how you talk to women.”

“Yeah, okay. Sorry.”

I wasn’t mad. It barely registered. I was too busy obsessing about my plans.

This was it. All the pieces were in place. I had the welding equipment, the custom electronics, and the HIB was ready. My breathing got short and my heart nearly beat right out of my chest. My little caper wasn’t theoretical anymore. I was actually going to do this.

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