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"So, how did you like your first real editorial meeting?"
"It was great," I said, giving her a big smile. "So exciting to sit in on an editorial meeting."
"How long have you been with Dominion again?" she asked, frowning. "Three months?"
"Four," I replied. "How about you?"
"Three years," Krista said, her eyebrows raised. "It took me three years to move from being a lowly admin assistant to Maria, the acquisitions editor, to an editorial assistant and I have an MA in English. I heard you're starting as an editorial assistant with Sharon when your internship is over. Talk about lucky."
I glanced at her because her tone sounded anything but happy for me. It sounded pissed.
I smiled, not wanting to get into a pissing match with her. "I'm really excited."
"Of course, you're also marrying the big boss, so..." Krista said, when we stopped outside my office door.
"I am," I said and didn't say anything else on the subject. "Nice to talk with you."
I went inside my office and closed the door in her face, my blood pressure up about twenty points. I stood with my back to the door for a moment and took in a deep breath, trying to calm myself.
Krista had a lot of nerve...
Of course, even I had to admit that I was getting a plum job in Dominion Publishing after only six months on the job as an intern. Was it because Sharon was going along with Josh or was it because she felt I deserved it?
I wanted the job, but I honestly didn't feel I deserved it just because I was marrying Josh...
Was it totally unfair that I was getting a paid job as an editorial assistant?
I went around and sat behind my desk, suddenly unsettled about everything. The very last thing I wanted was to get a job which I wasn't qualified to do or entitled to do. Yes, I had an undergraduate degree in English, and yes, I had worked as an editor for the school literary magazine. During my time at Dominion, I'd picked a few good manuscripts that the company ultimately bought. I had even succeeded in picking out three manuscripts that had been slipped into the slush pile as a test of my judgement.
But I had only worked as a slush reader for the past four months.
Did they promote all their interns after so short a time with equal qualifications?
Or was it nepotism?
With that question unsettled, I spent the rest of the afternoon trying to focus, but it was hard, and my mind kept coming back to Krista's expression and tone.
14
Josh
The biggest problem facing me that day was staying focused. With everything going on in my personal life -- the engagement and upcoming wedding, renovating the new apartment, and the paternity issue -- my mind kept wandering away from the matter at hand. Which, at that precise moment, was a financial forecast for the rest of the year. Not my favorite part of being CEO of MBS but one of the most important. I had to keep on top of the numbers and make sure the financials were solid. I trusted my finance team utterly so when they told me there was an issue, I knew to pay attention.
Usually.
During this meeting, my mind kept wandering to Alicia and the prospect of being a father before I'd even gotten married. If I was the father to her baby, it would mean a lifetime of responsibility and connection to her and the child that was not of my own choosing. Yes, I had slept with her several times, but I hadn't taken it beyond sex, and she didn't seem too concerned when we split. Had I been so wrong? Or was it just one of those flukes of fate where one false move, one tiny slip in concentration and boom. Your life goes in a totally different direction.
I just couldn't believe that the moment of contact Alicia and I had during sex was enough to get her pregnant. It had to be wishful thinking on her part.
I stared at the report in my hand and replayed the night I'd spent with Alicia over in my mind, focusing in on that moment when she was on top of me and I thought she would only kiss me and not try to actually ride me. When I felt her body press against the head of my dick, it felt incredible, but at the same time, alarm bells rang out in my head and I actually lifted her up and off of me, joking that she was getting carried away. I had grabbed a condom and slipped it on, and we continued where we left off. Could that tiny moment of contact hav
e been enough? If my dick entered her body, it wasn't more than an inch. That would have to be the unluckiest inch ever to have entered a woman's body if so.
No. I was certain that I wasn't the father and that Alicia was just desperate to have someone -- anyone -- on the hook to help her. How much more desirable as a baby daddy was I compared to her other prospects? She worked in the financial industry in marketing -- some low-level job -- and so she wouldn't be able to provide a really good life for the child. Someone like me would be a boon for her because I would have to ensure the child had the very best of everything in keeping with my own level of income. That could only benefit Alicia.
I noticed the room was silent and glanced up from my document, the image of Alicia pushing a stroller dissipating when I saw that everyone was looking at me expectantly.
I hadn't even heard the question.
