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You might be wondering why I was talking to Dave Mills. Well, it’s a long story but I went to one of your dad’s Doctors Without Borders fundraisers and Dave was there. We got to talking and that’s how I heard.
I’m so glad that you are moving forward with grad school, Kate. I was afraid you would give it all up.
When you get back, I hope we can put the past behind us and get together, maybe be friends once more. I miss you so much, you wouldn’t believe. It’s like there’s this great big hole in my heart where you used to be.
I’m willing to try if you are.
XOXOXO,
Dawn
As angry as I was with Dawn for trying to break us up, threatening to tell my father about Drake’s Dom tendencies, and for searching Drake’s past for dirt, I felt the same as her. She and I had been friends for so long, I couldn’t imagine my life without her somewhere in it. I might have to accept that we would never be friends again, but I could still feel sad about it.
I didn’t think we could ever go back to the way we were, because Dawn did too many things that crossed the line, but at least we could be civil. I wouldn’t be inviting her to be maid of honor at the wedding or anything, but a détente would be preferable to outright animosity.
My mother always said to me that it was important for a woman to keep her female friends close even after marriage and children because no one else understands who you are quite the same way. Other than Dawn, I really didn’t have any close female friends and I felt bad about losing her. It would mean that Drake was all I had. Then I realized that we might move away from Manhattan at some point and I would only have Drake regardless of what happened with Dawn. That didn’t scare me in the least because he was always fun and interesting and enjoyable to be with, no matter what we were doing.
Still, a woman without friends outside of her relationship could become lonely. I decided I would put myself out there and make a point of meeting other people because no matter where we lived, Drake would always be busy with his surgery and his band, the corporation and the foundation. I didn’t want him to give those things up because they made him the man he was and I loved that man.
Maybe, as the years went by, and as Dawn came to realize what a wonderful person Drake was, and how good a husband and father, she’d ask for forgiveness instead of just asking for tolerance.
I wasn’t sure Drake would want me to forgive her even if she were truly repentant. Although people do make mistakes, bad judgments and are flawed, what Dawn did crossed the line. Still, I was so torn. I was flawed and had ma
de mistakes before. Could I find it in my heart to forgive her?
Whether to forgive Dawn was the least of my worries and I didn’t bother to respond to her email. I didn’t need that at the moment. I needed something to help me go to sleep and thinking about Dawn would only delay sleep, not speed it on.
Instead of fretting about Dawn, I sipped my chai tea and read over Elaine’s and my father’s Facebook feed, soaking up the pictures and posts that documented their lives back in Manhattan.
As much as I loved Kenya and Nairobi, and as much as I enjoyed our house and the art class, I missed Manhattan and my family. It would be so great to go back, start work on the 8th Avenue apartment to get it in shape and dig in to my MA thesis research.
I’d have to meet with my thesis advisor and work out a new thesis topic, but I was sure that we’d agree on what approach to take. Then, I’d start to do the legwork, and search out appropriate research subjects to interview. I felt a surge of excitement at the prospect of starting back at Columbia, especially now that I was determined to focus on art instead of politics.
For the first few weeks after returning, I'd be busy with school, the apartment, and then the wedding. Although it would be a small wedding at my father’s apartment, with only a few friends and family, it would still require planning. I had to find a dress, and pick out a gift for everyone who took part, and then there were the vows, and the honeymoon…
I finished my tea, and scribbled down a list of to-do items in my journal and decided it was time to go to bed. When I crept under the sheets beside a naked Drake, all warm and sleeping quietly with his back to the door, I thought how lucky I was to have him all to myself. I snuggled closer and closed my eyes, letting his warmth penetrate me and the sound of his breathing lull me to sleep.
As was his usual practice, Drake woke early and had showered by the time I woke up. I glanced at the clock and saw that it was only 6:30 a.m. I didn’t want to get up but I did want to see Drake off. I rose from the bed and went to the kitchen where I found Drake , humming some sixties tune to himself, fixing a cup of coffee and eating a bowl of granola. I tried to stifle a yawn, and stood at the kitchen’s island, running a hand over my sleep-mussed hair.
He turned and saw me.
“There you are,” he said and came right over, bowl and spoon in his hands. “Sorry if I woke you.”
“No problem,” I said and leaned up on my tiptoes to kiss him briefly on the lips. “I wanted to talk to you before you went.”
“What are your plans for the day, Ms. Bennet?”
I considered. “I want to finish the painting and do some more packing.”
“How late did you come to bed?” he asked and slurped the milk from his bowl.
“Just after midnight. I had a cup of tea and read my emails. Speaking of which…” I said and hesitated, not sure I should bring up Dawn’s email.
“What?” he said and put his bowl into the dishwasher, before turning to face me, his eyes on mine. “Tell me. Is it Ethan?”
I shook my head, wondering how to tell him. “No,” I said and made a face, scrunching up my eyes. “Dawn.”
His eyebrows rose at that and he turned to get his cup of coffee. “Oh.”
