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"How are you?" I said, deciding not to push the whole Drake business with her, since she clearly didn't recognize me or understand what I'd said to her. "Are you feeling better? You look better."
I checked her pulse and found it was stronger than it had been before. Her O2 was better – still not perfect, but improving with oxygen. She was a bit raspy, her occasional cough wet, but she seemed less agitated than she had earlier in the morning. She must have slept.
I sat like that for probably fifteen more minutes before Herb and Kent arrived. They had coffee cups in hand from the hospital's cafeteria.
"Drake," Kent said and gave me a nod. "I thought you might drop by before your shift. I hope you got some sleep."
"I'm fine. I'm used to working with little sleep."
"You doctors," Herb said. "You're used to torturing yourselves."
He smiled and then, I saw a look pass over his face and I wondered if he only then thought about my background in the BDSM community. Did he know about my past? About the trial? No doubt he wouldn't understand the difference between the SM and BD side of things. There was nothing to be done about it, so I merely smiled back.
"Medical school is hell, being a resident is even more hell, and being a specialist means you never get much of a break, especially if your specialty is rare and in demand."
"I can imagine," he said.
"She seems better," I said. "I didn’t check in with the nurses because they were on a report before the shift change, but I will on the way out. How does she seem to you?"
"Better," Herb said and took my place at my mother's side when I stepped away. He bent down and kissed her on the lips and she seemed to recognize him at least and kissed him back.
"That's my girl," Herb said, squeezing her hand. "You remember me, don't you, sugarplum. It's me, your husband Herb."
She whispered something and he bent down to listen. When he stood up, he shook his head sadly and turned to me.
"Can't make anything out, I'm afraid. But she does recognize me. I can tell. She wouldn't let me kiss her otherwise."
I felt so bad for him and couldn’t imagine how I'd feel if Kate was to stop knowing who I was. It would break me in two.
"She may, but just can't vocalize it because of the disease."
"I think so," he replied.
I watched them for a moment and then checked my watch. "Well, I better get to the ER. My shift starts soon and I want to check on my patients from yesterday first. I'll drop by on my break and see how she's doing."
"Thanks, Drake" Herb said and came to me, his hand on my shoulder. "I'm so sorry you had to meet your mother again in these circumstances. I wish we had tried sooner to contact you, but just weren't sure if it was a good idea to bring it all up at the time."
"No, that's fine. I understand completely. I'm just so glad that Kent did decide to contact me. It means the world to me to finally see her again. I wasn't sure I would want to, but no matter what happened, she's my mother. I love her."
Tears filled my eyes and Herb put his hand on my arm. "We all do. She's loved."
I forced a smile and then kissed her cheek, even though I was sure she had no idea who I was, and then I left the room, wiping my eyes quickly.
I went to the nursing station before I went to the ER and looked over my mother's chart, to check and see what changes there had been during the time I was away. She had steadily improved, although her condition was still guarded. Satisfied that she was doing as well as could be expected, I left the ward and made my way to the ER, stopping to change into something fresh before my shift. I was happy to be as busy as possible for the next twelve hours, so the time would pass quickly and I wouldn't worry too much about my mother.
Luckily, the cases I had to consult came fast with little time between them and so I didn't look up from my work until it was time for my first break. At seven o'clock, I left the ER and went to the cafeteria, grabbed a sandwich and a drink, and ate on the way to my mother's ward. I didn't stop into the staff lounge. I could only imagine what would greet me if I did – my fellow staffers would no doubt be talking about my resignation. I still hadn't had the chance to talk to my supervisor about it, but expected I would at some point in the evening.
My mother was resting quietly and had been feed, and had eaten a bit of pudding and drank some liquid protein. It was good because if she hadn't, they would have to tube feed her and that would only add to her stress.
I spoke with Amanda for a moment and then said hello to my mother. She was as confused as before, willingly taking my hand, but not being able to say anything sensible. I said goodbye and left after only a few moments, because I didn't want to intrude too much into their lives.
"Please, Drake, feel free to come back and visit any time you want," Amanda said. "Honestly, it's good to have you here. You can check over her chart and let us know how
she's doing."
"You don't trust your doctor?" I said, frowning.
"No, it's not that. It's just that doctors tend to sugarcoat the worst news and downplay the best. At least, in my experience. You can tell us straight how she's doing."
