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"God," I said, my gut in a knot about it. "I knew she was dangerous when I saw her at O'Riley's but I never would have thought she'd actually try to kill someone, let alone me."
"I should have quit right away," Drake said, his voice regretful. He sighed. "Maybe none of this would have happened."
"You couldn't know. None of us could know she was crazy."
"Couldn't we? Maybe Derek didn't know her as well as he should have. Maybe I shouldn't have blithely agreed to top her, not knowing anything about her background and history. Usually, I relied on Lara to vet the subs I topped or signed a contract with. I didn't because I assumed that Derek, who I thought was a responsible smart guy, would have done so. I wonder if he knew about her past. If I had known, I wouldn't have become involved with her. Someone with a traumatic past involving real abuse should probably approach the lifestyle very cautiously. For some it might be healing. For others, it might just screw them up even more. There are bad guys in the lifestyle who prey on women like Lisa."
"Usually they don't get murdered by those women," I added. "She was a piece of work, Drake. Probably only someone really trained in psychopathy would recognize her behavior and be worried."
"I should have been," Drake said softly. "There's no excuse, considering I studied psychiatry. I even considered psychiatry as a specialty."
"Don't blame yourself." I reached over to squeeze his bicep. Sophie put her head down on Drake's shoulder, sucking away on her pacifier and Drake turned to me, his eyebrows raised.
"Looks like somebody is ready for a nap," he said softly.
"Looks like it. Do you want to take her or should I?"
"I will," he said and stood up carefully, carrying her up the stairs to the bedroom. I waited on the sofa, turning on the television to watch the headlines. Luckily, there was nothing on the news about the case. I didn't relish seeing any pics of me or Drake on the screen. Reporters often referenced my case when they first talked about Lisa, since she had been convicted of attempted murder. Luckily, the reporters all used an old photo of me from several years earlier. While I had been stalked a bit during Lisa's first trial and had a few pics taken of me, so far I'd escaped their attention during the lead-up to her new trial. I wanted to keep it that way. I'd taken to wearing my hair up in a bun rather than down, and when I went out in public, I dressed down as much as I could so I blended in with the rest of the crowd.
I didn't want anyone sticking a mic in my face. In my mind, the trial couldn't end soon enough. Once it was done, there was yet another trial on charges of reckless endangerment for encouraging Jones to commit suicide.
Drake came back down and sat beside me, pulling me closer to him. "She went down easy," he said. "We are so lucky."
"We are," I said and smiled up at him.
"Are you going to the studio?"
I nodded and stretched. "I want to finish this piece I'm working on. That way, the series is done and I can send some slides to the gallery and see if they're interested in an exhibition."
"That would be great," he said and pulled me onto his lap. "Give me a kiss before you go. I need some Kate time."
I kissed him and laid my head on his shoulder and we sat like that for a few moments, listening in the background to a news report on one of the news networks.
"One day, all this business with Lisa will be over and we can go back to our real lives. I feel like we're in limbo right now. You can't do anything until the news dies down after the trial is over."
"All we can do is put our heads down and wait."
I kissed him again then stood up from the sofa. "I'll go for a couple of hours and should be back in time for supper. This time, I'll cook it. How about a stir fry? We have that broccoli and some chicken in the freezer."
"Sounds good. I'll read over some reports Dave sent me on new projects. I don't get to approve anything but at least I'll know what the foundation is doing without me around."
"Poor Drake," I said and bent down, kissing him once more. "It's so unfair to you."
"It's for the good of the foundation. I can still see the good it's doing. I don't need my name or face connec
ted to it to be fulfilled."
"You're too good," I said and grabbed my bag before going to the front closet to get my coat and boots. I glanced at the window and saw that it was starting to snow. I texted Mike to let him know I needed a ride. Drake got up and came to the front door. "Give me one more kiss," he said and leaned forward.
I did, slipping my arms around his neck briefly.
"Have fun," he said and released me, opening the door. "What do you say to an artist going to their studio? Break a leg doesn't sound right."
"Make good art?" I said, laughing.
"Make good art," he replied and closed the door as I went down the stairs to the street level.
Outside, the sun was covered by thick grey clouds. There were a few hours of sunlight left but the days were getting shorter and the air was crisp. Fat snowflakes drifted down from the sky. I loved this time of year because it reminded me of the start of the happiest time of my life -- meeting Drake and falling in love, our trip to Africa and then our wedding. The birth of Sophia hadn't been the happy event that I hoped it would be, but we survived and now we were a happy little family -- despite the trial and all the fallout for Drake.
