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Dylan shook his head and rubbed his hand down his face. “I don’t know what I deserve anymore. I just know I can’t keep hurting Serena, but not having her in my life is killing me, too.”
“Then put a goddamn ring on her finger already,” his brother said, clapping him on the back. “Trust me, you’re all she needs, but she needs all of you, not just a half-assed version of yourself that’s scared to put your heart on the line for her.”
Leo’s words stayed with Dylan for the rest of the afternoon, rolling around in his head and giving him the time he needed to build up the courage to take that leap of faith. As the party finally came to an end and everyone was gone but immediate family, his mother, Grace, came into the kitchen, where everyone was gathered, along with Charles, and placed an old-style photo album on the island counter.
“What a day,” his mother said, all smiles and beaming radiantly.
“We’re all so happy for both of you,” Peyton said, giving Grace a warm hug. “You two are clearly meant for one another.”
“I do have to
say that love has been so much sweeter the second time around,” Grace said with a content sigh as she stared into Charles’ eyes. “I can’t wait to marry this man of mine.”
Charles drew her close and placed an affection kiss on her temple. “The honor will be all mine, sweetheart.”
Aiden groaned. “Okay, you two, if you don’t quit, we’re going to have to insist you get a room.”
A bright pink blush stained Dylan’s mother’s cheeks, and she turned back to the photo album she’d brought into the kitchen. “I came across something while I was going through old boxes that brought back some fun memories and made me smile. Dylan and Serena, come here. I want to show you this.”
Serena reluctantly moved next to Grace, and Dylan stood next to Serena, close enough that he could inhale the floral scent of her shampoo and feel the warmth of her body next to his. His fingers itched to touch, but he didn’t dare give in to the temptation.
“This is a scrapbook I made of the two of you growing up,” Grace said, flipping the book open to the first page, which showed pictures of Dylan and Serena as toddlers playing in a plastic pool together, splashing each other and having fun.
He caught Serena’s melancholy smile, while Daisy and Peyton crowded around to get a better look and awww’d in unison. His mother turned the page, revealing images of them a bit older, around four, eating cupcakes Grace had made and smearing frosting in each other’s face. Everyone laughed and made jokes but Serena, who seemed to be trying very hard not to show her emotions.
More pictures as they grew up together . . . with Serena all frilly in a princess outfit that his mother had made for her to wear for Halloween, and him in a Disney prince costume, which he did not look happy about getting stuck with—and his brothers were currently teasing him about. He clearly remembered wanting to be a superhero villain instead, but the sweet, adoring expression captured on Serena’s face as she looked at him was pure infatuation, and her crush on him had started around then, which Dylan had been oblivious to at the time.
His mother had captured a photo of the two of them lying in the grass in Dylan’s backyard, their heads close together as they stared up at the clouds and pointed out all the different shapes and images they’d found—with him holding her hand as if she’d belonged to him even then. More fun, casual pictures through middle school, with Dylan’s arm slung over her shoulder and those pretty blue eyes once again gazing up at him as if he’d hung the moon and stars for her.
Yes, it was clear for everyone in the room to see that Serena had worn her heart on her sleeve for him. And he’d been a clueless kid.
The album ended just as high school began, and that significance wasn’t lost on Dylan, because that’s when his feelings for Serena started to change, when he’d become aware of her as more than just his best pal, and desire and teenage lust had him noticing the new, shapely curves of her body. When the urge to kiss her became too unbearable, he’d focused on other girls instead. He’d deliberately spent less time with Serena and firmly kept her in the friend zone because of his fear of losing her.
Now, he realized he’d fallen in love with her back then, and years later, those feelings had only grown stronger and deeper, despite his attempts to keep them tucked away, always to protect Serena from himself. But the truth was, nobody could ever compare to her, and nobody ever would.
His mother closed the book and pushed it toward Serena. “I thought you might like to keep this, since it’s pictures of you and Dylan.”
Serena bit her bottom lip, which quivered slightly, and shook her head. “I appreciate the gesture. I really do. But I think Dylan should take it,” she said, her voice husky, as if she were holding back tears. But then she exhaled a deep breath and pasted on a smile. “It’s been a wonderful party, but it’s getting late and I really should go.”
Dylan recognized her abrupt departure for what it was—an excuse to put distance between them, to lessen the pain she was so obviously feeling. It was a Saturday evening and it wasn’t as though she had to work the next day. He watched as she made the rounds, saying goodbye and hugging each person in the family . . . except him. Hell, she wouldn’t even look his way, and when she walked out of the kitchen and down the hall to the guest room, where the girls had left their purses, his brother Leo shot him a look that said, It’s now or never.
It was definitely now. With everyone staring expectantly at him, clearly waiting to see what his next move would be, he followed the direction that Serena had just taken.
12
Serena heard the sound of soft, padded footsteps into the guest room, and certain it was either Peyton or Daisy checking up on her, she quickly dashed away the tears that had slipped from the corners of her eyes after that too emotional trip down memory lane, which only reminded her of what she would never have with Dylan. The boy she’d grown up with, the teenager she’d had a crush on, and the man she’d fallen in love with.
She turned around, startled to find Dylan standing there instead. She didn’t say a word, but as he closed the distance between them, her heart threatened to beat right out of her chest.
“Serena,” he said, so softly, so tenderly that it threw her more off-kilter than she already was. And when he picked up her hand and clasped his warm ones around it, her first reaction was to try and pull it back.
He held it tighter, not letting her escape. “Please, just listen to me, okay?”
She didn’t say anything, mostly because her throat felt too tight, but figured since she wasn’t walking away from him, that ought to be enough of an answer for him. She was here. She’d listen. But she wasn’t sure there was anything left to say.
He swallowed hard, his Adam’s apple bobbing nervously. “I handled things very poorly that morning at your place, and I’m so sorry. I never should have let you walk away from me. I never should have left without telling you how I feel.”
For a moment, she held her breath, wondering if he’d finally say the words she desperately longed to hear him say.
