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While Mayuri liked Koyal, she wasn’t sure she understood her, especially when it came to Atharv. She had seen Koyal pace their little room very nervously as Atharv sat for his first year final exams at IMI, but when he had called immediately afterwards, she had pretended to have forgotten that his exams were beginning that day.
Each night, without fail, Koyal would wait for Atharv to call her to bid her good night, and when he didn’t, she would panic, and then hesitatingly call him, trying so hard to sound cool, pretending she was calling to discuss something important, all the while nervously biting her lower lip.
Koyal would scrounge the whole of Ghaziabad for food she thought Atharv would like, and then when she handed it to Atharv, would pretend it was left over from the tuck box Mayuri’s mum had sent.
And then the time she found out Atharv had fever, Koyal had simply dropped everything and left for IMI. She had a midterm scheduled that day. She flunked because she didn’t appear for it, not because she hadn’t studied for it, as she’d told Atharv.
A giggle from Koyal brought Mayuri back to the present. She stared at her roommate.
Koyal had the blackest eyes Mayuri had ever seen. They reminded her of lava, made her think of fierce loyality and unbridled passion. They were eyes that belonged to a person who, if set her mind to climbing Mount Everest, would not stop till the peak had been conquered, no matter how scary the winds, how rough the terrain and how impossible the challenge. But then, just when Mayuri would think she had her figured out, Koyal would smile. No, not smile – grin. A lazy, sleepy, meandering grin. A grin that said she couldn’t care less about anything in the world; nothing mattered enough to her; nothing would ever matter enough to her.
And Mayuri wouldn’t know what to believe in – the eyes or the smile.
Third year was drawing to a close. It was the day before Diwali, and Nili and Atharv were studying together for the exams in a quiet corner of the library.
‘So I finally get to meet Koyal?’ Nili whispered, her eyes shining with excitement. Atharv no longer felt stunned by their gorgeous beauty; they simply filled his heart with peace.
‘Yes, she’ll be here today.’ Atharv smiled indulgently at Nili’s excitement. How grateful he felt that Nili seemed to already really like Koyal. He had been needlessly worried.
‘Um … you … um,’ mumbled Nili, taking her eyes off the handsome face that looked at her intently. They weren’t even doctors yet, but Nili had no doubt that one day Atharv would become not just a good doctor but a great one.
‘I?’ he prompted, moving a bit closer to her. The little corner of the library where the two sat was surprisingly deserted.
‘Um … you asked me what I would hate most about the holidays after the exam.’
Atharv smiled. ‘Yes.’
‘I have an answer now,’ she said, her eyes shy and hesitant.
‘I’m all ears,’ Atharv said with an indulgent smile, trying hard to keep his face expressionless. He wondered why his heart had begun to beat faster. What did it know already that he did not?
‘That I won’t get to see you every day,’ she softly.
Atharv stared at her.
‘Atharv,’ she continued, now staring at his hands, ‘we have known each other for almost three years. And since the moment you appeared in my life offering to carry my bags, I … I have felt different. I … I don’t know how you feel about me, and … I…’ She looked up helplessly, her large eyes pooling with tears.
‘I guess what I am saying is,’ she continued bravely, ‘well, simply put, I think I love you, Atharv.’ She touched her forehead absently, looking everywhere but at him. ‘I … I love you … I…’ She now looked up at him, face flushed and earnest. ‘I love you more than I ever thought I could love anybody and I just needed to tell you that. Just to get it out of my system. So that it is not inside me eating me up, but out there, with you for you to … um…’ She trailed off helplessly now.
She looked up at him and saw his face was expressionless. Her heart sank and a deep, embarrassed flush appeared on her face.
She was about to run out of the library when a strong arm gripped her wrist and gently pulled her back into her chair. He pulled his chair closer to hers.
Their eyes met. Hers teary, his thoughtful.
He was thinking of beauty in fragility. How fragile Nili looked, her heart in her hands, telling him with words that she loved him, asking him, without words, to love her.
‘I love you too, Nili,’ he said finally and Nili felt she would die of relief.
‘I love you,’ he repeatedly softly, more to himself than to her this time, and leaning forward, planted a gentle kiss on the side of her lips. It was intimate and confident, yet so gentle. Nili felt her body distintegrate into a million butterflies.
A moment’s pause. Atharv leaned back and gazed into her eyes and then leaned in to kiss her again, more passionately this time, on her mouth.
His first kiss.
Her first kiss.
They would both remember every little detail of the kiss.
