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Bobbi raised her chin. “Maybe I wasn’t ready to hear about you and Jane Lawson.” She all but spat the name.
His mouth tightened, and his eyes glittered in the dark. “I told you three months ago. Nothing happened.”
“Well, it didn’t look like nothing to me.”
“I suppose it didn’t, but that doesn’t change the fact that it’s the truth. Jane is a friend, and she’s going through a hard time right now.”
“Is that what she is? A friend? Really?” The image of Jane bent over Shane while he was lying on the sofa was one that still made her stomach clench. It was no secret that Jane and Shane had had a thing way back when. In fact, Jane had been one of the reasons their relationship had imploded the first time around. So to find her in Shane’s studio three months ago during a time when she and Shane were in the thick of their own problems was too much.
It was still too much tonight.
Bobbi decided to put that aside for now—she didn’t have the strength or inclination to deal with it. She needed to know what Shane was thinking. Why was he back?
“I’m done going in circles, Bobbi. We’re not doing that again. Either you believe me or you don’t.” He sat back and watched her. “It’s your call.”
He didn’t wait for a reply. “But while you’re thinking about that, you need to consider something else.”
She moistened her lips. “And what’s that?”
“We fought about Jane that night. I was pissed you didn’t believe me, and you were pissed because you thought I was lying. We fought and said a lot of shit we probably shouldn’t have, and then we did what we always do. We had sex.”
He paused, and she wanted to look away but couldn’t.
“More than once, if I remember correctly. And then you were gone, and there was nothing, not a note or phone call, and next thing I knew, you couriered over separation papers.” He didn’t bother to hide his anger. “What in the actual fuck was that?” He got to his feet and shook his head. “You know what? Don’t answer that question, because it doesn’t matter.”
Her heart sank at his words. Was this it? Were they really over?
Shane’s expression changed—he looked dangerous—and instantly, she was on guard. This was the Shane she was scared of—the one who could make her lose her mind with one glance. He took two steps and bent forward until their faces were inches apart.
His gaze moved over her face and rested at the base of her neck, where Bobbi knew her pulse beat erratically. God, she was hot and anxious, and her stomach was a mess.
“I’m going to be real clear about something, Bobbi Jo, and I need you to pay close attention, so don’t look away.”
Even if the hounds of hell were on her tail, she couldn’t move an inch.
“Somewhere along the line, things went south with us. A lot of little nothings became a big fucking something and grabbed us both and wouldn’t let go until there was nothing left to grab hold of. You fell away from me, and I don’t know why. And I’ll tell you one thing. Our problem isn’t anything to do with Jane Lawson. It’s about all those little bits of nothing, and maybe we figure out what those little bits of nothing are and go from there, and maybe…”
He bent even lower, so close that if she moved slightly, she could press her lips to his. Mouth dry, she could do nothing. She couldn’t agree or disagree. She could only stare up at him helplessly.
Then he angled his head, and she felt the heat of his breath on her cheek and against her ear. “Maybe we can start over and find our way back to what we were, because, Bobbi, what we were was pretty damn special.”
Voice husky, Shane pulled away and looked down at her. She wondered if he could see how she trembled beneath the blanket, or how pale her skin was.
“I could say the ball’s in your court and that what happens from here on forward is up to you, but that’s a lie.” Shane stepped back. “You don’t have a choice. We’re doing this, and I’m not going anywhere.”
He left on light feet and disappeared into the shadows the same way Coral had done earlier. It wasn’t until he’d been gone a few minutes that her body relaxed, and she expelled a huge breath as she ran her fingers through the tangle of hair at her nape. It was damp with sweat.
She wanted to cry and laugh and yell and scream.
But she did none of that. Instead, Bobbi sank back into her chair and found those fireflies again. They still twinkled among the bushes, unaware of the drama, and the sight of them soothe
d her soul.
For first time in months, Bobbi felt hope. But it was overshadowed by a secret she didn’t know how to handle. She knew that if Shane found out about the baby, he’d never let her go. But she had to be sure of a few things before she told him. She needed to know that what they had was strong enough to endure, that his love for her was secure and his need to be with her wasn’t tied up in the thought of a baby. Because Shane was right. There were a lot of reasons they’d ended up apart, and nothing would break her heart more than to give in to that need, to that pull between them, only to find out a year or two from now that what she and Shane had wasn’t enough.
That all those little nothings were still there, adding up to something bigger than the both of them. She wouldn’t survive another breakup.
And for the first time in her life, she had someone else to think about besides herself or Shane or her family.
