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She read it once and then a second time as the sickening sense of shock and disappointment spread outwards through her body.
The bank was sorry, but it could not agree to her request.
There was a lot more to it than that, of course, but essentially that was what they were saying… a firm and unequivocal ‘no’.
It was several minutes before she realised that there was a second page to their letter. Its contents only reinforced the message of the first page. It named the estate agents who would be acting for them and warned her that the agents had been instructed to go for a quick sale.
So much for her promise to Rory that they would all be together for the summer holidays… Together where? At her parents’?
The temptation to give in to her own fear and misery was almost overwhelming, but what was the point? What good would it do?
When the phone rang she raced to answer it, illogically hoping that it might be the bank ringing to say they had changed their mind, but instead it was Susie.
‘Hey, where are you?’ Susie asked her cheerfully. ‘You were supposed to be coming round here for coffee and a natter this morning—remember?’
‘Yes… yes… I’m sorry… I was just about to leave…’
‘Philippa, what is it? What’s wrong?’
‘I heard from the bank this morning,’ Philippa told her. ‘They aren’t prepared to let me stay on in the house and apparently they’ve instructed the agents and asked them to look for a quick sale.’
‘Oh… oh… I’m so sorry…’
Susie’s quick sympathy made her eyes sting with tears.
‘Well, it isn’t all bad news,’ Philippa told her. ‘Believe it or not I have actually been offered a job…’
She stopped speaking abruptly. What on earth had made her say that? She hadn’t intended to discuss Blake’s visit, nor his job offer, with anyone. What was the point, when she had already decided not to take it?
It was that stupid pride of hers again, she recognised grimly, over-reacting against the sympathetic pity she had heard in Susie’s voice.
‘A job… The little girl?’ Susie guessed excitedly. ‘Tell me all about it.’ Philippa sketched the details. ‘It sounds marvellous,’ Susie enthused. ‘When do you start?’
‘I don’t. There’s a problem,’ Philippa told her.
‘A problem. What kind of problem, minor, major or mega?’
‘That,’ Philippa told her, ‘depends on how you look at it.’
Quietly she went on to explain.
‘Mmm—curiouser and curiouser,’ was Susie’s only comment, but when Philippa pressed her to explain what she meant she refused to do so.
‘But if you don’t feel attracted to him any more——’
‘I don’t,’ Philippa interrupted her sharply.
‘Then there isn’t really a problem, is there?’ Susie pointed out gently. ‘He obviously isn’t concerned abou
t what happened in the past; if he were he wouldn’t be so keen to employ you, would he? And from your own point of view there’s obviously nothing to fear, since you don’t lust after him any more. Which brings us to another point.
‘I don’t want to sound preachy, but there are other reasons why it might be a good idea for you to take this job, apart from the more obvious commercial ones, that is—or don’t you agree?’
Philippa sighed. She knew what Susie meant.
‘You mean Joel,’ she acknowledged wryly.
‘If that’s his name, then yes. You said yourself that it couldn’t go anywhere; that he was married and that the last thing you wanted was to be responsible for another woman’s potential unhappiness,’ Susie reminded her.
