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“Nope,” he says, walking to the edge of my bed. “I’ve got the floor. Literally. It shouldn’t be this hard. Now, I know you’ve been in love with her for years, and I’ve seen you the past few weeks, ever since she returned. So has everyone else. You’ve both been lit up like the sun, happy and alive.”
We lock eyes, holding gazes like two teams in a tug of war.
My uncle doesn’t understand.
I was happy before all this trouble. Now, my throat burns knowing she’s gone.
“Marty told her she was the reason you joined the Army,” he says.
Slowly, I press a hand to my head. “Fuck. Why’d he do something that stupid?”
Uncle Grady shrugs.
“Guess he hoped she’d finally see the light and admit she loves you back,” he tells me. “He’s beside himself that it backfired and sent her away. You and Rachel need to sit down and talk, without the same old song and dance. Tell her everything. She believes you wanted her to leave again. That’s why she packed her bags and flew the coop.”
“Better that she did,” I force out. “I’m no fuckin’ good for her, Unc. I smashed her heart with a sledgehammer before while she was just a kid. Then she was kidnapped and nearly strangled to death. All because I couldn’t pull my head out of my ass long enough to whack an obvious snake.”
“Interesting,” he says slowly, giving me this brown-eyed sideways glare. “She thinks you were shot because of her. She won’t stop beating herself up.”
“Hell, no. None of this was her fault. I knew something wasn’t right about either of those strangers and I should have acted.”
“You should’ve acted on your feelings for Shelly.” He walks to the chair, setting a hand on the duffel bag. “Now, I know you can live the rest of your life without her, but my question is, do you want that life without her? Don’t bullshit me, West.”
I roll my eyes.
“Not when we both know you’ll go on loving her even if she moves to Antarctica. You’ll always wonder what you’re missing. What-ifs will be torture,” he continues, throwing his hand up before leveling another glare on me. “Imagine, boy. Imagine never falling to sleep next to her every night and waking up with her snuggled against your side every morning. Imagine never knowing the joy of being married to your best friend. Never having children with her. Never—”
“Enough! Just—fuck, stop.”
I can’t take the images he’s hammering into my rock of a head.
Scenes of everything I’ve always deprived myself from having.
“Oh, I’m sorry,” he spits sarcastically. “Did I finally strike a nerve?”
“Screw you,” I mutter, throwing him an eat-shit grin.
He laughs bitterly.
“Man, I’ve always been honest with you, even with things you didn’t want to hear. You’re my nephew and I tell it like it is. Right now, I’m telling you it’s time to let go of the past. All of it, West. When you stagger out of here, I want you to give up living in the past. Live with the rest of us in the present.”
Grady isn’t wrong.
The truth is one big bitch with diamond-sharp claws.
When I hit rock bottom before, he told me I needed help and worked like hell to pull me out of that tailspin.
“I know,” I whisper.
He holds a hand behind one ear, cups it as if to hear better.
“What was that?”
I roll my eyes at him again.
“I said I know, okay?” I shake my head. “And I know that Shel and I need to talk. I need to tell her everything.”
He nods solemnly.
