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Dirk studied her, a woman who had no family, had lost a great deal, and thought of what a bright light she was to those who knew her. “How is it you remain so positive when you’ve had so much loss in your life?”
“Everyone faces loss, although certainly there are varying degrees. Attitude is a choice and I choose to be happy.”
“Even though you’re pregnant with my baby?” He hadn’t meant his question to sound so negative. Neither had he meant to hold his breath while he waited for her answer.
A smile softened her expression. “This baby is a blessing. I might not have thought so when I first found out, but that was foolishness. Our baby is a miraculous gift. All babies are.”
He let out the breath, relaxing a bit that their baby would be loved, that Abby would be able to wrap this baby in her goodness, that she’d make up for the hole where his heart used to be. “You’re the gift, Abby.”
Clasping his hand, she lifted it to her lips, pressed a soft kiss to his fingers. “I’m thankful for you, too.”
Her eyes glittered with compassion, which usually sent him running for the hills, but there was more in Abby’s gaze. So much more.
In her eyes he saw hope. Hope that he could be what she needed. Hope that was a waste of her goodness since her hope centered around him.
Dirk’s apartment stood out in stark contrast to Abby’s house. No brightly lit Christmas tree. No wrapped packages. No Christmas spice candles. No garland or bows. Nothing.
For that matter, his apartment was stark when not considering the Christmas season. The bare necessities interlaced with a few high-tech niceties. Nothing warm and inviting.
A sofa. A fully loaded entertainment center worthy of hosting all sporting events. A square coffee table with a few sporting and medicine magazines tossed onto it. The area of the room meant to hold a dining table held a weight bench and an elliptical stair machine instead. Two stools sat in front of the bar that divided the kitchen from the open floor plan. The kitchen looked just as barren as the rest of the apartment. As if he barely lived here.
He’d been here, what? Two? Three months? Not a real long time, but enough that a home should begin to reflect its owner. Perhaps this bare one did.
Glancing toward her, Dirk paused, obviously reading her expression. “It’s a place to live, Abby.”
She nodded, aching more for him than she had since the morning he’d told her about his wife and daughter’s deaths. Emotionally, she’d continued to waver back and forth between her growing feelings for Dirk and the pending sense that she needed to ship her heart to the North Pole in the hope of keeping it out of Dirk’s clutches.
“It’s a nice building.”
He threw his head back in laughter. “Which is your way of telling me my apartment is sadly lacking.”
Glancing around the sparse rooms again, she shrugged. “Well, at least I know what to get you for Christmas.”
Christmas was Tuesday, just a few short days away, and she’d not bought him anything, hadn’t known what to get him. She’d figured she’d make him a tin full of peanut-butter goodies, but she wanted to give him something more.
His laughter faded. “I don’t want you to get me anything, Abby.”
“I know.” She bit her lip. She hadn’t meant to say that, hadn’t meant to mention Christmas at all.
They’d just stopped by his apartment so he could grab a shower and clean clothes, then he’d promised to take her out for dinner. When she wasn’t nauseated, she was starved. Today had been one of those days where she couldn’t get enough to eat.
“I mean it, Abby. No presents.” Of course, Dirk would say he didn’t want anything. She understood that, planned to get him something anyway. After seeing his apartment for the first time today, she had a much better idea of things he could use.
“But—”
“No buts. I’m serious. Do not get me a present. I don’t celebrate Christmas.”
She didn’t say anything. How could she? Dirk was the most important person in her life. She couldn’t not get him a present.
He eyed her as if waiting for her to argue. When she didn’t, he gestured toward the entertainment center. “Make yourself at home. Watch whatever you like. There’s drinks in the refrigerator. I’ll only be a few minutes.”
Abby nodded, but rather than sit on the oversized leather sofa she wandered around the barren room. No pictures hung on the wall. No little knickknacks sat on the coffee table. Anyone could have lived here. But Dirk did.
Her heart ached for him all over again. He really had cut himself off from the world after his wife and daughter had died. If not for work, she wondered if he’d have any contact with others. Until her.
She’d definitely pushed him outside his comfort zone with her Santa requests and numerous volunteer stints.
Now they were going to be parents, which definitely pushed his limits. Dirk needed her. Needed this baby. Maybe he didn’t realize just how much but, looking around this apartment, Abby did realize.
