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She’d fucking hate this. The thought came to me instantly, and I was happy I’d come prepared. Even though Thomas had said she’d only woken up for a moment, I had a feeling the woman who taught me all about the finer things in life would hate looking like some old hag who was happy to find bargain basement deals.
I crept to the door and looked out into the hallway, left and then right, to make sure there’d be no intruders for the next few minutes. I closed the door and set up my bag full of luxury skin care products on the rolling table beside the bed. I took a seat and got busy getting Sadie fixed up so she—at the very least—looked like herself.
After a quick cleansing and two-step moisturizing, I settled into a chair close enough to allow me to lean over and pamper her face. I talked while I worked.
“Sorry I didn’t come sooner, or more often, but I couldn’t, ya know? Seeing you like this is hard. Probably not as hard as it’s been for you, but I couldn’t do it.” I let out a sigh and smiled at the way the makeup put some color back in her skin. “You’re like a mother to me, Sadie. You showed me how to be strong, and I should have been here more often. But I’ve also been helping out at Lucky Lopez to make sure your eye candy is trained properly.”
I added a pop of blush pink color to her lips that almost gave the illusion that she was merely asleep, taking a quick break from being a badass for a nap.
If only that’s all this was.
“I know you never want to hear stuff like this, but you haven’t woken up yet, and there’s nothing you can do to stop me. Thank you, Sadie Ashby. Thank you for saving me, for helping me find myself and my strength. Thank you for teaching me that I was worth so much more than I ever realized.”
Sadie hadn’t just saved me from that would-be rapist that night so long ago, she’d given me purpose. A real job that took advantage of my bubbly personality and a second job that allowed me to live like a boss bitch. She taught me all about designer brands and fashion, and how to work what I was blessed with to get paid.
The life I had, it was nothing like the lives of Kat or Maisie, but my life was amazing. No, it was more than amazing; it was exceptional. I loved the way I lived, and I owed all of it to the woman who lay here unmoving, her hair now shiny and curled the way she liked it.
“The only thing missing is Chanel.”
It was strange to see Sadie without her trademark Chanel suits, but somehow the woman radiated what Chanel meant. A strong but feminine woman who could do exactly what the men did, only she did it better.
So petite in her designer wardrobe, she now showed signs of being the woman I admired more than any woman in the world, the woman who commanded an army of men who did her bidding. Big, bad, tough guys who would take a bullet for her without being asked, including Jasper.
Especially Jasper. For all his coldness, hardness, his ruthlessness, he was still a guy who loved his mother and would do anything to protect her.
Jasper was a walking contradiction that way. He was a bad boy to the bone, but he was also a decent man. Looking after employees and business interests on both sides of the law required a certain level of steel and ice in his veins, an unflappable demeanor, and a merciless nature that told the world that he didn’t take shit from anyone. It made him hard-hearted, but he wasn’t a man incapable of love. No, Jasper was a man who didn’t want love, not in the traditional sense anyway.
But he would be a good father if that was what he wanted, what he chose to do with this baby. Our baby. And if fatherhood was something he wanted to be part of, I was fine with that.
I wanted more for my child, and I would do whatever I could to make sure he or she had more. Had better.
“What a mess I’ve gotten myself into, Sadie.” I continued to talk while I painted her nails, a deep burgundy shade that I always thought so at odds with her love of light, feminine colors. “You always told me to be careful with my heart, and it feels like it was the one piece of advice I didn’t pay attention to but should have.”
I didn’t know if Sadie had any idea how I felt about Jasper, and I wouldn’t be the one to tell her, but I needed to talk to someone, and the coma made her the best listener.
