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“Can I play outside?” she asked.
“In the backyard,” I said.
Lillianna smiled and hurried over to the sink. She stood on her tiptoes to set her plate inside before she ran out the back door. I watched her go with a smile. She was growing up so quickly, I hated to miss even a single second with her.
“Mom,” I said, turning back to face her. “Do you think I made the right choice? When I decided to keep her?”
My mom’s eyes widened slightly
at my words. We’d never discussed my change of heart that day in the hospital. I never knew how she felt about it.
“Honey,” she began slowly. “I think what really matters is whether you believe it was the right thing.”
“Most of the time, I do,” I said. “But there are times when I wonder if Audra would have been better for Lili. There are times when I question whether I was meant to be a mother at all.”
“You love your daughter,” she said.
“More than anything.”
“Then, you’re doing alright,” she smiled. “What makes a good mom isn’t living in the right place or providing a traditional family. It’s loving your child and doing everything you can to help them succeed. From what I can see, you’re doing that.”
“Thank you.”
My mom’s words filled me with warmth. I sat back in my chair and checked the time on the kitchen stove. It was almost nine which meant I had to meet Logan in an hour. Lillianna would be in bed by nine thirty, I hoped. I didn’t want to tell her where I was going.
“That’s the third time you’ve checked the clock,” my mom said.
“I’m meeting someone,” I explained. “After I put Lili to bed.”
“Someone?” Her eyebrows arched upward.
“Logan.”
“Ah.”
“What?” I asked.
“Nothing,” she shrugged. “I’m just not surprised.”
“And why not?” I asked.
“You two never could stay away from each other.”
Twenty
Piper
At the bar, I considered which booth to sit in. Our usual table was just past the bar, up against the side wall, but the idea of sitting there made my skin crawl. That was where he told me he was leaving all those years ago. I didn’t want to relive that moment.
Instead, I chose a small table in the back. Only two chairs sat around it and there was no one in the vicinity. The closest patron was sitting at the end of the bar, a good twenty feet away. I pulled out a chair and sat down, wiping the sweat off my palms. I was more nervous than I’d been the night before.
Kellan’s felt different than Martello’s. At Martello’s we were just two old friends catching up. Sure, there was chemistry and tension, but nothing I couldn’t easily ignore. At Kellan’s, though? I knew I wouldn’t be able to deny my connection with Logan. Especially not after what happened the night before. The pub held too many implications, too many reminders of our time together.
When Logan walked inside, he spotted me immediately. The way he moved was enough to make my face flush. As he smiled, I couldn’t look away from his lips. I had to shake myself to stop remembering the way those lips felt against my skin. I gulped. It was going to be an interesting night.
“You made it,” he said as he sat down across from me.
“Of course, I did,” I smiled. “You didn’t think I’d show?”
