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“Thank you for this. I need to find a good man so bad.”
“I hope he works out for you.”
She waved and walked toward the door.
“Call and let me know how it goes,” I said.
“Yo
u know it.”
After she left, closing the front door behind her, I sat back and took another drink of wine. My eyes moved to the laptop screen where I saw a large photo of Max without a shirt.
I thought about Cooper and Max both for the next few minutes. Did I even like either of the men? No, I told myself. You’re fine being alone for now. Concentrate on your career.
As the night wore on, I found myself becoming more than a bit jealous of Laura going on a date with Max. Why had I set up my best friend with him?
With each passing minute, I became a bit more upset with Cooper and the games he was playing too. Why should I tell him everything if he wasn’t telling me everything?
The night stretched on forever with no call from him.
I eventually went to bed, feeling more alone than ever before.
TWENTY-TWO
Jade
The next morning, waking alone, I missed Cooper. Why did he have such an effect on me? Had I made a mistake giving Laura Max’s number? Was he the better man for me? I couldn’t have both and at this rate might not even get one.
As I dragged myself out of bed and through my morning routine, I wondered whether I should call Cooper or not. I decided against it and went to visit my father instead.
I usually visited him at least one Saturday a month, and I hadn’t done so yet in June. He lived in Staten Island, which would take me a while to get to by train.
The time I spent with him was worth it. Growing up, my father had also played the role of mother after my mother died. Whenever I felt stuck in life, I went to see him.
Lately, I’d been bogged down quite a bit. Did I really need either man? Sure, Cooper could make me feel good in bed, but he kept secrets from me. And Max.
In the kitchen, eating toast and jam for breakfast, I wondered how he and Laura had gotten along. Had I made a mistake bringing those two together?
I would talk to her before the weekend was over. In the meantime, I prepared myself mentally for visiting with my father. There was no telling what mood he would be in.
Over the years, he had sacrificed so much to give me a chance to attend a decent university. My school loans were still not paid off, but I’d been sidetracked after losing my job as a freelance journalist.
The editing gig paid reasonably well, about double the national poverty rate. It wasn’t much, but it paid the bills and kept me in my general field of writing. Yet there I sat, eating toast and jam every morning instead of having brunch out with someone I loved. Fuck my life.
*
I found myself sitting across from my father at his round kitchen table. The leaf for the middle hadn’t been used in years. He stared at me with his disapproving eyes, never satisfied with me.
“Go on,” he said.
“That’s it. I can’t decide between two men. It’s an obvious choice, really. I don’t know why I’m telling you.”
“Well, I have my mother hat on, but let me take that off a moment.”
“Please don’t, Dad. How’s work going?”
“Fine. I’ll be traveling again soon.”
