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Rose then sat up and stretched out. The swells of her breasts peeked under her shirt, and her nipples poked through the top, too. Fuck me.
“Let me just get dressed.” Her voice was still groggy, and she got up from the bed, walking slowly to the bathroom.
As she used the bathroom, I put my shoes back on and my jacket. She came back into the room and pulled clothes out of her dresser. I liked how messy her room was; it wasn’t a pig sty or anything, but it was like another part of her. The clothes peeking out of the dresser, the disorganized bookshelf, and the little pile of clothes on her side chair. It was just like her.
She started to undress, and I nearly lost it. “You must not want us to make it out of here,” I said to her.
She smirked at me as I stared at her breasts and watched them sway before she put her blue lacy bra on. I stared until she got fully dressed in her jeans and brown sweater. She stuck her feet in fluffy white slippers and I followed her out.
“Are you hungry?” I asked her as we passed her kitchen.
“No.” She locked Parker in his crate and refilled his water bowl. “I don’t really have an appetite. I mean, what if it’s him?” Worry laced her voice and I was honestly lost for words.
“Rose, you shouldn’t think like that.”
She met me by the door. “How can I not?” She shrugged and grabbed her purse, then we left.
The drive down to the station wasn’t long, but Rose got even more tense the closer we got. I held her hand, but she still clenched mine hard.
“I wish I could say it gets easier, but I don’t want you to ever have to deal with this kind of shit again,” I told her softly. I turned the radio off, and the silence of the car was deafening.
“So, the next time I see a crime I should just keep walking,” she sighed.
“No, cause that isn’t you. But…hopefully next time it won’t turn out to be involved with the Irish mob.”
She laughed a bit and I noticed her neck relax a little bit. “I hope not. So, what do we know about the suspect so far?” she asked me.
I shrugged my shoulders and took a hard-left turn. It was a wonder I ever got a license. “I don’t know, Nate didn’t tell me everything.”
I turned and saw the lines of her face draw inward. “Look, I don’t want you to be thinking about all that. Just go in and look at the guy. That’s all you have to do.”
She scoffed. “I’m not some dumb, average citizen you know. I don’t deserve to be kept in the dark all the time.” She took her hand from mine and crossed her arms. “If I want to know what’s going on with something I am directly involved in, I don’t think that’s absurd.”
“Rose…”
“Don’t ‘Rose’ me. Please. It’s more condescending than it is helpful.” She turned her knees to the window and looked out in anger.
I wished I had something to say to her, but she was right, and anything I was used to saying would just come off wrong, like she said. I just wanted her to feel better, and I wanted her to feel safe. But I couldn’t even do that. It made me feel shitty and pretty useless at that point.
“I’m sorry, really I am. I’m not good with…usually I can treat witnesses like parts of a case and nothing else, but I can’t do that with you.” I blew out a nervous breath. She turned to look at me after a moment.
“Why not?” she spoke softly.
“Because,” I half-laughed, “you’re fucking special to me, Rose. And you mean more to me than just…than this shit going on. I don’t want to hurt you, or scare you. I just want you to be happy. You’re more than shower sex or a surveillance stint. And I just keep thinking…I just don’t want all the crap in this case to hurt you.” I inhaled deeply and pulled into the station.
She stayed silent as I parked the car and turned the engine off. She unbuckled her seatbelt and then leaned across and kissed my cheek. That sweet little gesture made my chest swell and everything but my cock twitch; it was new to me.
She hugged me softly, her hair rustling against my cheek, and I hugged her back. We got out of the car and then stopped before we went in the building.
“We can tell you everything inside,” I told her.
Her eyes were wide but sure as she nodded at me, and I almost felt stupid for underestimating her.
“Okay. Thank you.” She gave me a small smile. I hugged her once more, her body flush against mine as I inhaled her scent.
I knew then that I always wanted to hold her. And I always wanted to keep her safe, at any cost.
Chapter Twenty-One: Rose
