AllFreeNovel
Share Us
umbled throughout my body. His fingers traced the line of my spine, up and down. Side to side. Filling my back with shivers as I ground down into his leg.
“Looks like I’m not the only one with another blissful round in me,” Hayden said.
“I can’t help that your touch is electric,” I said.
“Boogie woogie woogie?”
I playfully slapped his chest and a smile slid across his cheeks.
“Not a fan on the electric slide?”
“Not everything is a joke,” I said.
“But you’re having fun, right?”
“Actually, I want to say something.”
“You’ve been saying a lot of things. Though most of them in broken sentences.”
I rolled my eyes and fell off to the side as he turned and moved with me. My hair was spread across my pillow and his eyes were dancing around my face. My hand found his and I laced our fingers together, then brought the back of his hand to my lips. I kissed every single knuckle before nuzzling it against my cheek, taking in the soft strength of every part of his body.
“You’re filled with it, you know,” I said.
“Shit?”
“No, you idiot. Manliness.”
Our eyes connected and I watched his playful stare grow stoic again.
“You being in that chair didn’t make you any less of a man to me just like strolling into my apartment on two feet didn’t make you any more of a man, Hayden. It’s your countenance. Your confidence. Your demeanor and the way you make me feel. The give and take between us and the hot electricity that shoots between our bodies every time we connect. It’s the longing looks and the shivers your eyes give me and the swell of your chest before dipping into a strong set of abs. It’s the thunder in your voice and the ice behind your eyes and the intelligence that falls from your lips within the purest of conversations. Those are the things that make you a man to me, Hayden. Not your legs or your ability to walk.”
His hand released mine and came up to cup my cheek. His thumb stroked my skin, flushing it with his simple touch. I closed my eyes and allowed his warmth to trickle over me as his body scooted closer to mine. His leg slid between my thighs and I could feel my wetness pooling against his skin. Coating him in the shimmering juices his graceful touch was creating. I turned my face into his palm and kissed it, listening as he grunted at the pressure.
Then his thumb slid across my bottom lip and I drew the tip of it between my teeth.
“Such a naughty girl,” he said, his voice hot and heavy. “And to think I could’ve gotten you so wrong.”
“There is nothing more I want in a man than his ability to make me feel like his equal,” I said. “And whenever I’m around you, I feel like I could be.”
“Could be?” he asked.
I kissed the tip of his thumb before my eyes darted down to my hand. For a split second, that memory came washing back. The memory of how his hand stung so badly against my skin. And I saw recognition flash across his stare. A memory of that same moment that took the lust in his eyes and morphed it into a heavy sadness. His hand slid down my neck. Down my shoulder. Down my chest. He left a trail of goosebumps behind him as he wrapped his hand around my wrist. He pressed our palms together and I followed his motion, our hands rising at the same time until they were in front of our faces.
Then he laced our fingers together and drew my hand to his, kissing my wrist over. And over. And over.
Until no other sensation was left but the feeling of his lips and tears filling my eyes.
“I’m sorry,” Hayden said. “I should’ve never done that to you.”
“It’s not even that you smacked my hand away,” I said breathlessly. “It was the implied expression of worthlessness. I enjoyed being around you. I enjoyed helping you. I enjoyed taking care of you, Hayden. But in that moment— for one brief, elongated second— I hated everything about you.”
I watched him physically wince at the statement.
Like I’d struck him against his cheek.
I didn’t know what to say other than that. I’d wanted to say it for weeks, but I never thought I would get the chance. Out of all the fighting and the battles we weathered, that one I couldn’t get over. That one I couldn’t get out of my mind. I couldn’t explain away. It had been so raw and vulnerable for both of us, and instead of pulling me closer in his time of need he shoved me away.
“Are you going to do that when things get rough?” I asked. “Are you going to slap me away and command me to leave? Because a man doesn’t do that, Hayden. When a woman wants to help him— wants to break down her walls for him— he not only cheers it on, but he does it in return.”
