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“I hate that, Mike,” Mum said. “Why are men like that, always abusing and intimidating? You must know more about it than I do.”
“I guess it’s just that testosterone, Sue,” said Mike. “You know, it makes it just impossible for a man to control himself. That fellow who just showed up, he probably has a thing for Tamara in his own way. He might be grown up in the eyes of the law, but knowing how to keep yourself under control, as a man, that’s amost a lifetime’s work.”
“Do not say things like that, Mike,” Mum snapped. “Don’t validate the behaviour of abusive men. Especially not men abusing my daughter.”
“Okay,” said Mike. “I won’t. I’m sorry.”
She was deflating, retreating from her fighting position. And she had just revealed what that was all about: the situation with Brad, the lie she’d told. She didn’t really dare come after Steven against my will when I already knew she’d crossed the line so badly.
Maybe I would be able to make my escape into my bedroom… But Mum turned back to me.
“Maybe you can take the day off school tomorrow anyway. Just a stress-breaker. We won’t talk about anything you’re not ready for, but we could spend some time together. We all seem to be so busy these days, maybe I’m missing out on a lot.”
“Mum. Please.” I tried to let my twitchiness manifest as annoyance, instead of the fear it really was. “It’s not going to do anything for my stress levels to get behind on schoolwork this close to exams and the end of the year. I just want to be able to get into school, do my work, and come home and then relax and not have to think about anything stressful.”
It was true. I wanted all of that… but I also knew I was not going to get it. But hey, it was a nice fantasy that might let my mum hear what she wanted to hear.
From the way she was shaking her head, I hadn’t been lucky. “I just feel like you’re subject to so many pressures right now, Tamara… I think I need to get you out of the way of any dangerous influences. Give you some time to get your head straight.”
I had to convince her to let me go to school. I knew how it would work otherwise. She would keep at me, she would keep talking and talking… and by the time I left again, I’d be completely convinced to stay away from Brad, to stay away from Steven—even Callie, now I’d let slip she had a connection to the Steven situation. I knew what she was like. I’d always known, I’d just never cared very much before now.
Suddenly, I realised just how much I had to lose.
I glanced at Mike. If I could get him on my side, he seemed to have a power with Mum I didn’t.
He was avoiding looking in my direction in a way that was probably deliberate, but he spoke up anyway. “Sue, it might be better to let Tamara go to school tomorrow, pick this up again on the weekend. If you work out there’s a need to pull her then while you get to the bottom of this, she’ll have some time to have organised to get notes from friends.”
It was a bizarre approach, the sort of thing you said when you didn’t really have anything else to say. But it seemed to have bamboozled Mum enough that she was actually thinking about it.
“She needs to promise she won’t go anywhere near him until we’ve had a chance to talk about this.”
Apparently, she couldn’t even look at me to make her demand.
Mike finally deigned to meet my eyes. “Tamara, can you promise not to get in contact with your father until you’ve talked with your mother?” Mum flinched at your father, but Mike seemed gritted-teeth resigned to the terminology.
“Sure,” I said, looking him right in the eyes. I wasn’t as nervous about lying to him as I would have been with Mum.
I was shaking a little when he looked over at her, though. “Sue?” I could only bring myself to look at her out the corner of one eye, and I hoped I wouldn’t give away anything to make her reconsider.
Finally, she shrugged. “Let’s see how things are looking in the morning.”
It was like there was suddenly air in our house again. Ryan stomped off. “I’ll be in my room if anyone needs me.”
“I think I’m done with dinner,” I added, quick on his heels. “I’m going to go get started on some homework, if that’s okay?”
“Sure thing, sweetheart.” Mum swung over to kiss my forehead, but I pretended I hadn’t seen her coming as I turned away. “I’ll come in and chat with you for a bit after I’ve done cleaning up, okay?” she called after me.
I had thirty minutes to an hour, then, to get out of that chat.
Once I was in my room, I pulled a whole bunch of books out of my school backpack. I stacked up a plausible pile at the bottom of my bed for someone who had been slacking on homework all week (something I was very familiar with the look of) and opened my maths stuff on top. If anything would be a believable knockout subject, it would be maths.
I sprawled myself across the rest of my bed, got a pen in hand, lay my head down on the edge of my workbook, and tried to think about maths to get myself in the right mood. If Mum invaded, I would pretend to be asleep.
I sat up, my heart pounding at the dimness. Something heavy thumped to the floor nearby—a textbook. I really had fallen asleep. Mum must have come in and switched the ceiling lights for my bedside lamp.
It was one in the morning according to my phone, but that wouldn’t stop her from coming back in to check if there were signs of life. I moved all my study materials to the floor and crawled under my covers without even bothering to dress for bed. Sleep was the closest thing to a safe place I had right now.
As soon as I could get a chance the next morning, I would ask Ryan to get me to school a bit early if possible. I just had to get myself out of here and to the meeting point with Brad. That was the only thing I could think about right now.
