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If I was better, if I cared about her more than I cared about myself, I’d accept Diana’s offer. I’d take the money, make her kill my father in prison, and move away somewhere else. I could give my mom a better life. I could help her recover from this horrible, deep depression she’d dropped down into.
We could start over.
But the thought of leaving Calvin hurt too much. It broke me, ripped me to pieces. I couldn’t do that to him, not when he was the one that actually cared while all the others were doing this for their own stupid reason. Calvin cared about me, he loved me, he was deeply, darkly, horribly obsessed with me, and what seemed like a nightmare at first was quickly becoming a daydream, and soon it’d be a reality.
I wanted that future more than anything.
I was sick and stupid. I should’ve run away.
I wouldn’t turn my back on Calvin.
Not yet.
22
Robyn
I got my shit together, cleaned up the tea set, put it all away, and got back into the car. My mom would be fine alone for a while. I spun the engagement ring around before starting the engine and driving to Calvin’s place.
We had to talk. He needed to know about what his mother said, and I wanted to tell him in person. I wanted to see his face, to feel his hands, to taste his lips—
God, what was wrong with me?
I should’ve just called.
It would’ve been easier. But I pulled up to his small, secluded cottage, parked, and stared at the door. His car was tucked to the side in front of a small detached garage. I knew he was home.
I could still turn around.
I killed the engine and got out. I knocked three times and he answered a moment later. He wore a pair of tight gray pants and a black t-shirt that clung to his body. His hair was damp from a shower and his eyes scowled at me, deeply and disturbingly. He was handsome, beautiful really. I stepped inside and the door shut behind me like the lid to a coffin.
“My dad called.” He didn’t say hello and didn’t ask why I was there. He stalked into the living room, pacing.
I knew that pacing. He was agitated and upset about something.
“What happened?” I stood next to the couch watching him like a lion tamer wondering if the new beast would turn and claw me to death.
“He’s asking too much. I knew this would happen. When I started this, I knew—and now he’s doing it.”
“Calvin, what’s going on?”
He stopped and looked at me, and the pain in his expression broke my heart.
“He wants me to drop out of school and start work immediately.”
I blinked rapidly. “He wants you to do what?”
“Not senior year. No football. No friends, no class, nothing. He wants me to work, Robyn.” He began to pace again.
“Why? You’re so close.” This didn’t make any sense. He had two more semesters, and then he was done. The experience he’d gain in the classroom have to be worth waiting two more semesters. “You’ll have a degree.”
I said it like something so mundane could matter to a family like the Solars. Degree or not, he’d rule over that company like a tiny lord.
“My life is here. You’re here. Jarrod, Des, and Addler are here. The last three years at Blackwoods has been the best of my life. Without this place—” He stopped and shook his head. “I don’t know what I’d be. Lost. Less human. More like my brothers.”
I could only imagine how much worse he could be. “So why not tell him no?”
“I can’t do that. Things are too tenuous right now.” His fists clenched. He stared at me like I was dinner.
I liked it. A shiver ran down my spine.
“Your mother visited.” The words spilled out and I wished I could pull them back inside, but it was too late.
He started and stared. “She visited? Your house?”
“She offered to pay me off. She wants Noah to win.”
He laughed and sat down in a chair. He leaned forward and pulled at his hair, and as I moved closer, he held up a hand. “I’m fine.”
“I’m sorry. I should’ve waited to tell you, but I thought you needed to know. She offered to match your price and would throw some money on top.”
He looked up and his expression was deeply sad. “Why didn’t you take it? That’d be a lot easier than staying married to me.”
“I’m not going to betray you. Besides, your mom’s a bitch and your brothers are dickheads.”
He grinned, but there wasn’t much behind it. “Very true.”
I walked to him and knelt down. I put my hands on his knees, trying to comfort him, but I felt a jolt in my stomach, deep and intense. His eyes locked on mine.
